When I began writing this story, I thought I would only cover certain topics. Mainly, my life in Philadelphia over the last ten years. The focus of Phicklephilly is romance and dating. But while on this journey, I realized my life is rich with so many other great characters, I should add them to the Phicklephilly universe.
So let me introduce you to my lovely daughter Lorelei. She turned 20 years old two months ago. Lor has always been a sweet, and easy-going child. Now a young woman. I am very proud of her, and it’s great watching her grow up and flourish. She’ll be occasionally popping up in my stories.
Her mom and I divorced when she was three and a half years old. She lived with her mom and came to me every other weekend. This went on for many years. I’m not going to go into all of the details of my divorced life because that’s not what this forum is all about. That blog would be called, Nightmare in New Jersey.
One thing I never agreed with, was her mother putting her on ADD medicine when she was a little girl. But happily, when Lor was thirteen she came told me that she wasn’t going to take that crap anymore because it wouldn’t allow her to perform in a dramatic way on stage. How fucked up is that?
Let’s have big pharma brainwash a bunch of stupid parents, and turn their creative and rambunctious children into dull robots, and life long drug-addled customers. Just so we can make even more money for the stockholders. Pure evil.
There once was a kid whose teachers described him as unreachable. A boy lost in his dreams. Yea… that dude was Albert Einstein. Let’s crush any future Einsteins or Leonardo Di Vinci’s with a bunch of drugs. Shame on you all. And damn you all for what you’ve done. I was very proud that my daughter had the foresight to see what that junk was doing to her body and mind. So she kicked that shit years ago.
Anyway, Lorelei had become tired of the grinding frustration of living with her mother in New Jersey. Her mother’s 2nd ex-husband after me was usually the blame, but once they divorced and he went back to Arizona, she was out of excuses. My daughter was an A – B student who was a beloved member of her high school’s theatrical group. She was lead soprano in a musical in 2014, and co-star of the musical they performed her senior year in 2015. This was a good kid. You have to wonder why life with her mother was so hard. What do we ask of our children growing up? Do well in school, and behave yourself. Lorelei was doing that and more. But I was married to that harpy for 8 years, and I know what kind of fresh hell it can be for anyone to live with my Lorelei’s mother.
My daughter was having stomach disorders and anxiety living with her mother. Being in that hell house with her mother had for years been an extremely difficult place to be. Sad thing was, I split after 8 years, her second husband amazingly lasted a full ten years before he left. But Lorelei couldn’t leave. She was a child. She was like a prisoner under the ragged claws of her mother. But once she reached the age of majority she wanted to escape. She turned 18, and by February of 2015, she asked if she could come live with me. “Daddy, I’ll sleep on the floor if I have to if it’ll get me away from her.” Of course, she wouldn’t have to sleep on the floor, and I would never turn my child away. So I told her to come live with me in Philly.
There was an obvious shit storm that ensued. Her mother likes to control everything but lacks any real control over her own life. But my daughter was 18 years old. She could do what she wanted. She could vote, buy a gun, and serve in the military if she wanted. So technically, there was nothing her mom could do about it. She fought it of course, but I think we even had my daughter’s high school on our side. They realized her mom is crazy and were fed up with her nonsense as well.
But all aside, I forgive her mother. It takes too much of one’s time and energy to hold a grudge against someone. That is some bad energy that you have to maintain every day. It’s just a waste of time. You only have to forgive once, and your mind is free.
Lorelei would get herself up at dawn every day at my house in center city. She would walk in the winter weather to the PATCO station and take the train into Jersey every day by herself. In the beginning, she actually was having anxiety attacks at the end of each day, because she was expecting something bad to happen. She discussed this with me, and it seemed like a form of post-traumatic stress disorder from living with her mother. I understand that. You never knew who, or what you were coming home to. I reassured Lor that nothing was going to happen. I was putting her on an allowance, and if she needed anything to let me know. I was always here for her, and she was now safe. All she would be coming home to would be her Dad sitting in his chair, sipping a glass of wine and watching Netflix. Nothing more. In a few weeks, she settled in just fine. She’d get up and go to school in Jersey every morning 5 days a week. She did this until she graduated in June of 2015. She graduated with good grades on a Friday and started working as a hostess in a restaurant here in Philly the following Tuesday.
She has since gone from vegetarian to vegan. She eats a balanced diet, and is lean and fit. Her stomach disorders are gone, and she no longer takes any of the medicines her mother put her on. She works at her job and likes it. I let her live her life.
I love her very much and would do anything for my baby. She’ll always be the apple of my eye. My one and only daughter. My immortality in this world.
I have always believed it’s not as hard as everyone thinks to be a parent. Just give your children love, good information, manners, consistency, and discipline. I’m sure there is more to it than that, but that’s a decent foundation.
I always looked at parenting this way. I am the Archer. Lorelei is the Arrow. I need to be firm when I hold the bow. But I also need to be flexible like the string. I must cast the Arrow straight and true into tomorrow, for that is a place I can never go.
Tomorrow belongs to our children. Try not to fuck it up.
Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.
You can check out my books here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1