Dating and Relationship Advice – Are Money And Social Status More Important Than Looks, Confidence And Determination Regarding Dating Success?

As in many other pieces published on phicklephilly, space, coherence and readership adaption call for less extensive reasoning about other positive factors, as well as constraining factors. I will now address some of these and explain why these three still determine the bulk of one’s dating success. I will also add a number of particular points that have not been emphasized in earlier articles.

Dating success
First I would like to explain what I mean by dating success. Since it seems more or less self-evident, many choose to not explain this. As I see it, though, dating success primarily means notch count understood as a decent balance between quality and quantity. One or two hot girlfriends over a period of 20 years do not make you successful by any means, although it might make a person happy if those long-term relationships have been mostly positive experiences and of course are preferable to dating average girls.

Conversely, 100 5s cannot be understood as substantial dating success either. For dating success to occur, a man most be able to bang a larger number of 7s, 8s and 9s, and not that many 5s and 6s in relationship to the total notch count. Sure there are guys who have claimed that three-digit numbers are required to be called a Don Juan – and indeed there are several levels of Casonova-ness – but those in the two-digit span can also be fine if the average quality is relatively high. Balance is important and one should not be too obsessed about sheer numbers, if not for other reasons than because there are other important things in life than raw score (pun intended).

Money and social status
I fully agree that a large degree of money and/or social status really are important factors. However, a large portion of these are generally outliers. Few men can compete with actors, pop stars, successful sportsmen and billionaires, but then most men do not belong to any of these categories, nor is it realistic to do so in the future.

Money and social status can be measured as continuous rather different variables. So to have a monthly salary of 10 000 US dollars is much better than to earn only 5000, which in turn is preferable to 2500 and so on. To have a relatively large network of friends and acquaintances and significant popularity within those circles, are of course better than a small network.

However, given that a man who is determined to improve himself in order to get laid will almost automatically try to improve his earnings and social status. But to use the money wisely and appropriately are even more crucial components. A man who is determined will not buy a Playstation 4 unit or gaming computer. He will not buy an expensive yet fairly mediocre car and drive around with his average girlfriend in it. He will, on the other hand, perhaps buy a ticket to Bogata, Madrid or Tokyo, a Hugo Boss suit and fitting shoes.

Regarding social influence one must realize that a lot of hunting occurs more or less alone. To have social proof is important sometimes, but day game, online game and night game mostly go hand in hand with individual efforts. Social circle game can be a powerful way to perform, but you must have looks and confidence within that circle, because otherwise it will be friend-zoning that awaits you. Agreeableness, extroversion and likeability only go so far.

Further, as Troy Francis logistics is one of the keys. A guy who is determined to have more dating success will try to fix that as well. It could be to pick a hotel instead of a hostel, rent an apartment closer to a club, or find a love hotel in Tokyo around 7:30 in the morning.

Sure one needs some degree of money for that, but that are the amount of resources that you have saved by making proper hacks and priorities. Most guys have that kind of money as they are clustered somewhere in the middle of the income spectrum in the West. The real issue is to figure out how to maximize one’s potential with disposable means, whether economic, physical or mental.

Constraining factors
Furthermore there are a lot of constraining factors involved. A guy can fall on the rope due to reasons that go beyond looks, confidence and determination. Being too introvert, mildly autistic, depressed, living in the completely wrong place, or making minor mistakes along the way will not serve you well.

I am not sanguine that everything can be fixed either, if not for other reasons than because genes largely     underlie personality and behavior. Still the extreme game-detrimental personality profiles are outliers, and since most men are clustered somewhere in the middle also in this regard most can improve themselves a lot in the proper direction.

Conclusion
Money and social status are indeed very important factors that underlie dating success. However, since most men are clustered somewhere in the middle of the income and social status spectrum, how and for what purpose he uses his disposable resources are more crucial than the earnings and network size. Constraining factors linked to personality and behavior are likewise outliers. The key is for the middle-man to work hard and figure out how he will accomplish the most with the least resources, which is linked to the determination factor.

 

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