I text her early in the day to tell her that I was looking forward to seeing her at El Rey at 5pm.
She replied: “Me too. You better be there. lol”
So cute. I promised her that I would.
I get there early. Around quarter of, because I hate being late for anything. Punctuality was drilled into me by my father at an early age, but we’ll save that for a later blog.
The staff is sweet. The hostess get me a nice quiet table in the back. I order a margarita to steady the pre-date jitters and I’m all set.
I text her that I’ve arrived and a photo of my icy fresh cocktail. She responds that she’s on her way. Then she texts again. “Just got the picture. You suck! Lol”
Holy shit, this girl has given me the greatest first date ever in this dating odyssey yesterday. Really good. Easy and nice. I like her!
Today she broke the record for arriving later than any date I have ever been on. She was a full hour late. I expected after 5 to be 5:15ish. I would have accepted 5:30, but now she’s pushing 6pm. It’s killing me. I am at my booth in the back of El Rey. Booth 11. Everybody has been great. The hostess Daisy has been a love, Meg my cute stepford wife-like server Megan has been great and attentive. She an adorable little Asian girl with blonde pigtails.
My phone is dying. (something I don’t ever allow to happen because I carry a charger with me at all times) But I need to keep in touch with Ambria who says she is still at work and has to write some notes. I don’t know what that means, but she’s a nurse and I don’t question it. I don’t even know where she is right now. I’m two margaritas in so I can’t complain, but I’m getting frustrated. If Ambria arrives they’ll describe my table as #11 or the booth with the singular white guy that is angrily talking to himself alone.
I’m feeling that old frustration again. Where is she? I know deep down, when I see her I’ll be fine, or will I? What does after 5 mean to her? Happy Hour is over at 6:30 here and we are burning guacamole over here. Tick Tock, Ambria. You need to get here. I think I’m only feeling this way because I like her so much. Goddamn it.
She texts me and tells me that she is en route and sorry that she’s late. I hand off my phone and charger to sweet Megan and she plugs me in at the back hostess stand. So at least my phone is close by.
Time is ticking away and I’m sitting there sipping and twiddling my thumbs. What if she just stands me up due to cold feet. That crazy thought crosses my mind but I push it away. I ask Meg to check my phone and see if I have a text. She grabs it and says there is a text. It’s Ambria and she says she will be there in a minute.
She tells me to order two of whatever I’m having and she’ll be there in a minute.
I hand the phone back to Megan and she puts it in her breast pocket. I like that my phone is face down against her supple breast. Yea, it’s a moment but I’m losing my shit.
Then I see baby come through the front door. She looks hot. Curls in place, lovely face smiling in apology, outfit looking tight.
She’s very sorry for being so late and explains. I was pissed because I could have gotten there later and could have maybe helped out at the salon tonight. But when I see her, as I knew, all would be forgiven.
She’s a nurse. Shit happens. She’s here now and looks great and is the same girl I met yesterday, so I’m back in the groove I was in yesterday. The tequila helps soften my mood.
I want yesterday’s energy tonight. She toasts me and we sip our margaritas. All is good. I admit to her that yesterday she hit the record for the best first date ever, and today she broke the record for being later than any other girl I’ve ever gone out a date with her. I can see she’s hurt and sad about failing me, and I turn it into a joke. I tell her it’s okay, and on our third date I tell her we have to break another record. Maybe I won’t believe I could hold my breath that long or had never fallen from such a height.
I don’t want her to feel bad, so I lay off. I don’t want to be my dad in this moment. She looks beautiful and I really like her, so I forgive her.
She’s plowing margaritas. Stressful day. They tell us happy hour is ending in 20 minutes so we order a bunch of tacos and some other stuff that she likes and she orders a pitcher of margaritas. That’s a bold move and she offers to pay. Not tonight sister. You took first date lunch bill. I got this, no matter the cost. You’re worth it.
The banter and flirting and witty repartee is still gleaming between us and I love it.
Never saw this one coming. I really like her. You never know. You have to keep going. Go on all of the shitty dates you can as long as it doesn’t break you financially. But keep going. Meet more people. Like sales. it’s a numbers game. Ask a thousand girls to dance and maybe one will say yes. But that one girl could be your life.
I’ve perfected this to an art. I’m at ease. I’m charming. I’m Hank Moody, but with all the charm and elegance, instead of the fighting and jail time. (Google: Californication)
It’s good again. It never stopped being good. I love being with Ambria. She’s fun, sweet and smart. There’s real chemistry here. I can feel it. It just works. It’s effortless. Why did I not see this in the other women I’ve been dating? If I can offer up a piece of advice here gents and also to the ladies, when you go on a date with a new person, it’s either hell yes, or hell no.
It’s that simple. I went on a bunch of dates. I thought, let me get to know her, let me be a better person, I should get to know her and be mature.
Fuck all that. You meet someone and go out. You feel something. A connection. It’s got to feel easy. They need to connect with you like an old friend but you just met them. Lean into it. Be true to that and you’ll meet somebody good. If you have to force it, or have to keep laboriously keep marching into dates, fuck that.
On our very first date we connected. You need to get that. It’s amazing. You’ll know. After the date, there will be no questions as to anyone’s intentions, or where it’s going. You’ll both only be filled with the “I can’t to see them again.” vibe. I swear, it’s that easy. Don’t waste your time. I’ve been at this for so long, I know. I will never dish out any bullshit in this blog. It’s rare and elegant but that’s what it feels like.
They don’t care who you are or what you look like, it’s just a connection. Just you and them. It’s happening. You almost can’t stop your hearts from attaining what they want in that instance. It’ll be like you’re teenagers again. It’s that simple. I like you, you like me, and lets spend more time together.
As adults we complicate this too much. It’s just the laws of attraction. We’re fucking mammals. We want to get it on. But we’re so intelligent and complicated we fuck it up for ourselves. Because we over think everything. Let the heart want what it wants and just roll with it. Relax. I know it seems complicated, but I’m here to tell you that it’s not. It’s just chemistry.
Kiss those frogs. Do it. Keep doing it. (Or maybe just a hug) Your Prince or Princess is out there and she can’t wait to meet you!
Tune in tomorrow for Part Two!
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