California Dreamin’ 1982 to 1984 – I Don’t Think I Can

Got asked out by an Asian girl I knew, but didn’t really know all that well. I just saw her from the clubs we hung out in. (Maybe it was The Roxy)

We went to see some band she liked at the Rainbow. Which I thought was cool because she knew my band and knew I’d like it. Once there she immediately was all over me (hugging, kissing, sitting on my lap etc.) Things were going great (or so I thought) It was at that point when things started getting weird.

Several band members where giving us strange looks from the stage, while playing their music. Bass player was mouthing things in our direction, but I couldn’t make out what he wanted. People were rude to me for no reason while getting drinks. Long story short: my date knew just about all the people there and wanted to get back publicly at her (very large) boyfriend (drummer, named Spider) for cheating on her.

I’m like WTF? I’m just a revenge date. I was pissed. I don’t want to start some shit with some other band on the strip over a groupie! I tell her I’m taking her home.
So we get to her apartment in West Hollywood and she asks me if I want to come up for a beer. I’m not going to turn down a free drink and I feel like she owes me for putting me in a weird spot.

Again, I wasn’t that into her and I figured I’d just drink the beer and split. Plus, the fact that she’s some dude’s girlfriend in another band just didn’t sit right with me.

Weird thing was when we get back to her apartment we start making out. We make it as far as the sofa. When I looked around the room it appeared she was really into anime. She started acting exactly like a girl in an actual anime. Started giggling and covered her mouth when I started getting undressed.

Gasped and hid her face when I took my underwear off. Se made these really high squeaking noises while I was having sex with her. She actually laughed and giggled through the whole experience. It was bizarre.

That being said, she was an absolute pro at giving head. After she had seen me naked she said she didn’t know dicks got that big. Which was the first and last time I ever heard that.

So we finish getting it on and I’m getting dressed. This has been weird but at least I got laid, but I kind of wanted to get out of there. She gets off the couch and puts her skirt on and walks to the bedroom.  She’s chattering like a schoolgirl about something, and I follow her into the bedroom, just trying to be nice.

It’s my first time over there, and there’s this giant bear on the bed. Like, ‘got the softball in the milk jug on the boardwalk first try tier bear’. It occupies 50% of the surface area of this girl’s bed.
“Whoa, how’d you score that bear?”

“I don’t know…”
“I don’t know.”
A few minutes go by.
“You don’t know?”
“Ok, look. It’s ok if it’s from an ex or your drummer boyfriend. I don’t care if you stole it. I’ll believe almost anything you tell me at this point. But there is no way in hell you’re going to tell me you don’t know where that giant bear is from. I had a stuffed dinosaur 1/4 that size that I got when I was 6 and I could tell you every detail about how I got it.”

“Well good for you. But I don’t know how I got it. Are you going to be able to let this go?”
Me: (Looks at her, looks at bear, bear stares back, eyes full of secrets)

“I don’t think I can.” (walk out)


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Author: phicklephilly

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