the action or process of calculating or estimating something.“last year was not, by any reckoning, a particularly good one”Similar:
a person’s view, opinion, or judgment.“by ancient reckoning, bacteria are plants”Similar:
evaluationway of thinking
ARCHAICa bill or account, or its settlement.
- There it is. A bill or account, or it’s settlement…
I was working this Saturday at the salon. I hadn’t heard from Kita the entire month she was in Florida. I’ve pretty much written her off and moved on. I got the one text that she was coming in to tan when she got back to Philly but didn’t respond. She kind of sucks as a person. But that’s just youth and privilege. She has all of these problems with guys because she’s clueless. She looked to me for advice and I did so much to help her. I even showed her how a guy should treat her. She’s so ignorant and dumb she couldn’t even see it.
All of the time I put in with her. The advice, the listening, and everything else. The gifts, the dinner, the lunch. She missed it all. Because she’s young, inexperienced and dumb.
Her petite Asian beauty is the only thing that has her hanging from a thread with me. But she’s been back for over two weeks and I haven’t heard a peep.
I know I sound a little butt hurt but what she’s done is just rude. But if I really look at it, It’s no worse than the horrible shit I’ve done to people as a youth. I created this relationship, and it’s failing before my eyes in a cold, dark silence.
Kita doesn’t even know. She feels nothing. She’s so self-absorbed, all she can see and feel is what her immediate needs are. It’s called being 21.
But the funny thing is, she was adopted into privilege. A dice roll that came up snake eyes. She and her sister won the lottery. My daughter is her very same age and is a more mature, better person than this vacuous little baby girl.
But like I said before, I’m the architect of this nonsense. I should have just stayed away and not gotten mixed up with her. All of the hours of advice and the long texts about other boys were nonsense. All a waste of time.
I think what made it hardest was the kisses. That’s what kept me in. Her sweet little kisses and our romantic moments. I’m a sucker for that with a girl and that’s the only thing that’s held me in this confusing and confounding game.
I’m actually okay with all of it. It’s not driving me nuts, because at my age I’m just happy to have any attention from young women. Cherie is still hanging in there but I don’t know for how long. Frankly, it doesn’t even matter to me anymore. Stay? Go?
I’m at the salon munching on a soft pretzel from Wawa. It has no taste. It’s just filler at this point. They were out of mustard packets so I’m basically eating a salty, flavorless, hard chunk of bread. Fuckin’ crap. Not even a real Philly pretzel.
I’m chewing a mouthful when cute Kita suddenly enters the salon.
I haven’t seen her in a month and a half. She looks the same. Not darker in the tanning department, simply the same.
I stop chewing and just stare at her in amazement. She was my number one and so much has happened since I last saw her. Sadly, the shine has gone off the apple.
I think about hot Delaney in the salon last night using the last of Kita’s lotion that I got for her and then dropping it in the trash. It’s laying in the can just 10 feet from her. I hope to God she doesn’t ask for her bottle… because it’s gone.
“How are you?”
“I’m good. I’m sorry I haven’t been in to see you. But It’s a new semester and my class schedule has changed. That’s why I’ve been coming in during the morning.”
“I thought that’s what probably happened.” (I really did)
Yea. I have a bunch of classes in the afternoon now and it’s hard for me to get down here after 3.”
“I missed you.”
“I missed you too. But I was just busy having fun doing nothing in the keys.”
I liked that she said that.
“I thought maybe you were staying away because you realized I did too much for you.” (I can’t believe I folded with that hand)
“Oh, no. It’s just my classes.”
I was praying that Delaney would walk in at this moment and worlds would collide and the new number one would meet the fallen queen. But that wasn’t going to happen.
“I’ve been talking to Steve again.”
I fucking hate this guy, He’s the rebound guy I consoled her on for an entire month and she’s still failing as a person with this loser.
“Yea. He called me when I was in Florida and said he was sorry for the way he treated me and that I didn’t do anything wrong. So that was good. So I’m talking to him again.”
Apparently “talking to” means kissing and hanging out with someone now.
I’m indifferent at this point and know that Kita will continue to make shitty decisions with men for the next decade. I simply don’t care. It only takes a month or so for phicklephilly to start closing doors and opening new ones now.
She tells me she’s been working out and is thinner now. She wanted to lose her belly but this baby is 5’1″ and petite and perfect so I don’t get it, but again, at this point I simply don’t care. (This is all part of her poor body image and general neurosis)
When I went to Wawa this morning I got what I needed food-wise for my shift, and I reluctantly picked up an extra banana. I thought I’d offer it to sweet Delaney, but now I am yielding to Kita.
“Do you want a banana?”
“I’d love a banana.’
I can’t go back. But here I am offering delicious fruit meant for my new number one and giving it to Kita.
She doesn’t deserve it!
Kita happily accepts the fruit and munches it like the sweet little chimp that she is.
I’m worried she’ll ask about her lotion but she doesn’t, and wants to check out a couple of packets of two different stronger tinglers. Bombshell and Body Shots. After a long decision process she settles on Body Shots. It make me think back on to how long she took with the fucking menu at Gran Cafe L’Aquilla.
I’m so done with her. She’s just a boring little girl. I wish Delaney would walk in here so we could erase her together.
It would be glorious.
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