My band was playing a gig at a local bar in Santa Monica. When you do some regular shows at a place you get to know the staff. This one waitress, I don’t know how old she was but she didn’t even look 18. She would always come and chat with me between sets. I think her name was Faye.
This went on whenever we got to play there. It went on for a few months. But one night she hands me a note after her shift and tells me not to read it until she was gone.
Well, I thought a note was a bit weird since that was grade school stuff but whatever. I open the note and it says things like:
“I love you. I want to be with you. You’re beautiful. We need to have children together even though I’m only 16, and it just prattled on and on. An overly attached girlfriend has nothing on this chick.
I used to get lots of phone numbers scrawled on napkins, notes and letters occasionally, but it was nothing like this. The next night, she asks sheepishly if I’ve read her note and I said yes but I wasn’t really looking for a relationship at the time. Her face lost all expression for a second and then she smiled and said something to the effect of ‘No worries, I thought I’d try’ and we continued playing there without incident.
That night, when I left the venue there were about 10 notes taped to my VW mini bus. Long notes too! I have no clue how she wrote this much in a day. The notes said things like ‘I hate you, you’re a fucking asshole, I hope you die’ and other notes said things like ‘I’m sorry for writing that note that called you an asshole. I really like you and want to be with you <3 <3 <3’
She would then try luring me with innuendos. When she was on her break she would do things like bring these long cucumbers out from the kitchen, come up and say things like ‘Do you think this pickle is for lunch or personal pleasure?’
She would also still put notes all over my van.
Eventually, after a few months she completely lost interest in me and started chasing a guitarist in another band that would play there on occasion.
Oh, my broken heart!
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