Dating apps have made it easy to strike up a conversation and flirt with anyone you find attractive. At least if you match with someone online, there’s a comfort in knowing they’re open to talking to you. But if you’re looking to meet someone offline, knowing when and where to get your flirt on can be a little challenging. According to dating experts, you can pretty much flirt anytime, anywhere. But to increase your chances of finding success, some places are better for flirting than others.
“We encourage all of our clients to be open to love no matter where they are,” Rachel Federoff, dating and relationship coach with Love and Matchmaking, tells Bustle. “Riding an elevator, taking a carpool Uber, going to jury duty, sitting in traffic, or simply being in line at a store can work, if you know how to work it.”
Whether you’re looking for love online or off, being good at flirting really starts with confidence. As Federoff says, “Confidence creates charisma. If you have that, then you’re already one step in the right direction. How you flirt depends on the situation.”
So here are some of the best places to flirt and the best way to go about it, according to dating experts.
1. Bar Or Coffee Shop
Bars, restaurants, and coffee shops are some of the most popular places to find other singles. When you’re trying to approach someone, there are obvious right ways and wrong ways to go about it. “Cheap one-liners and raunchy innuendos [likely won’t work]” Federoff says. How you flirt really depends on the situation. For instance, if you’re in a more intimate setting like a bar, Federoff recommends going for the “Gentle Jab.” “The Gentle Jab brings it back to grade school,” she says. “You like somebody, you poke them e.g. ‘Hi, the 90’s called, and they want their shirt back.’ This humorous interaction opens the door for playful conversation.” Keep in mind, there is a difference between playful teasing and negging. Teasing is light, fun, and good natured. Negging is none of that. If you can find a way to playfully catch their attention, it can be a great way to start things off.
2. The Grocery Store
“You may not think of flirting in a grocery store, but there are a lot of potential catches here,” Celia Schweyer, dating and relationship expert at Dating Scout, tells Bustle. In fact, Match’s 2017 Singles in America survey found that over 30% of people have flirted with someone at their local grocery store. Surprisingly, it’s about the same amount of people who say they flirt at bars. “We don’t think we might meet someone while we’re shopping for produce, but there are hundreds of grocery shoppers every single day and not all of them are in a relationship,” Schweyer says. “So the next time you do grocery shopping, be ready to give a one-liner about fruits or produce.” Be open to the people around you and the possibility that someone may be available.
Again, single people are everywhere. You don’t really need to look extra hard to find someone. You don’t even need to fit it into your busy schedule. If going to a particular place is part of your routine, be open to who you might meet. For instance, if you regularly jog or walk your dog, parks are great places to flirt. “Leave your house with the mindset of ‘I’m open, approachable, and ready to connect,’ get those airpods out of your ears, and keep your eyes up, make eye contact, and initiate a ‘hello’,” Evin Rose, dating and love life coach, tells Bustle. “Make this a practice, and it will become a lot less scary and awkward than you think.”
4. The Gym
The gym is another common place to find someone to flirt with. In addition to getting a good workout in, Schweyer says, “A lot of singles go to the gym because they have some free time and no commitment to anyone at the moment.” If you go regularly and you’re interested in someone you see all the time, you already have something in common. If you’re trying to flirt at the gym, Schweyer suggests keeping it simple. “Don’t be a show-off. Just be who you are,” she says. Unless you always go to the gym with full makeup on, there’s no need to start doing it just to impress someone.
A 2017 Plenty of Fish survey found that 44% of singles say weddings are a great place to meet someone. Over half say it’s just easier to start a conversation. If you want to flirt with someone at a wedding, Susan Trombetti, matchmaker and CEO of Exclusive Matchmaking, tells Bustle, “Lean in and whisper to them an inside joke. This will create your own intimate moment that you can share.” Light touching and flirty glances will also up your game. According to Trombetti, smiling and eye contact shows a “positive presence” that will always attract people to you.
6. A Class Or A Workshop You’re In
One of the best things to do if you’re looking to flirt and meet someone to possibly date, is create a list of places where your dream partner would spend time. If you’re looking for someone who’s compatible with your lifestyle, chances are, this dream person has similar interests and hangs around the same places as you. It’s why classes or workshops you take are great places to meet people. “I’ll never give someone the five best spots to meet singles in your city, because we’re all looking for different things,” Rose says. “The clearer you get on what priorities and qualities in a partner are most important to you, the more you can hone in on where to show up and do some scouting.”
7. A Friend’s Event Or Party
The next time your friend invites you over, say yes and follow through. “The best thing about saying ‘yes’ to these invites is you get to meet common friends,” Schweyer says. “You won’t be totally meeting strangers since you can just pull your mutual friend aside and ask for some inside scoop.” That way you can have a good idea about how someone is and whether or not they’re single before you make your approach. You can even ask your friend to make introductions. “Be sincere and don’t overthink too much. If everything works out fine, then good for you. If not, then better luck next time.”
It takes a little bit of practice to be good at flirting. But the more you do it, the more comfortable you’ll be. These are some of the best places to try flirting. So be confident and go for it. You never know where it could lead to.
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