The first few days after you break up with someone can feel pretty weird. You were used to texting this person all the time (with cute emojis included), telling them your every thought, and of course, hanging out with them regularly. Now, all of a sudden, there’s radio silence and all you can think about is what went wrong.
When you’re looking at your phone and wondering if it’s alright to get in contact with your ex-boyfriend, there are definitely some text messages that are totally cool… and some that he would frown at. In the art of breaking up, there’s a fine line between friendly and awkward.
Here are 10 texts to never send your ex, and five that he may actually want to read.
15. Never Send: ‘Who’s That Girl In Your Profile Pic?’
There’s really nothing worse than seeing a photo of your ex-boyfriend with another girl. You might be tempted to text him and ask who the girl in his social media profile picture is.
The problem? This will make you look kind of bad since you’ll look super jealous. This is a text message to never send your ex.
14. Never Send: ‘Remember When…?’
You might also be staring at your cell phone, wondering if you should text your ex and ask him, “Remember when we ate pizza for a week straight?” or “Remember that crazy vacation where everything went wrong?”
You don’t want to text him this, either, because it would just bug him.
13. Want To Read: ‘Want To Come To My Birthday Party?’
On the other hand, when it comes to text messages that your ex-boyfriend might actually want to read, asking him if he wants to come to your birthday party is one of them.
Maybe you said you would stay friends but haven’t made good on that promise. This would be a nice thing to do and a way of breaking the ice.
12. Never Send: ‘What’s Up?’
You never want to send a text that says “What’s up?” This is especially true if it’s late at night. This sends the message that you want to hang out and that you might still have feelings for him.
Even if that’s true, things might get awkward fast, and you probably would rather avoid that.
11. Never Send: ‘I Bumped Into Your Friend The Other Day’
You also don’t need to text your ex and mention that just the other day, you ran into one of his super good friends.
This is a totally unnecessary text message since he’ll probably hear about it. And he might think that you’re just trying to get in touch with him, not really saying anything.
10. Never Send: ‘I Love Your New Haircut’
If you texted your ex that you love his new haircut, that would creep him out. He would wonder how you knew since you haven’t seen him lately, and then he would realize that he posted a new photo of himself on social media.
You know that you check him out online… but you don’t want to make that super obvious to him.
9. Want To Read: ‘No Hard Feelings, Let’s Be Friendly’
Your ex probably wouldn’t mind if you texted him, “No hard feelings, let’s be friendly.” This is a particularly great text message to send if you two have mutual friends or run into each other on a regular basis.
No one likes an awkward breakup, and this would help with that.
8. Never Send: ‘Are You Dating Again?’
You don’t want your ex-boyfriend to ask you if you’re dating again, so you really don’t want to ask him this question, either. The truth is that you don’t need to know this information. You two broke up.
He’s not going to want to give you a straight answer, anyway, and then you’ll get even more frustrated.
7. Never Send: ‘We Need To Talk’
Rehashing the breakup is never a good idea. Yes, even if you thought of the perfect comeback to something that he said, or you think that you can “win the breakup.”
It’s not the best idea to text him “we need to talk.” He’s probably just going to say that he doesn’t want to.
6. Want To Read: ‘I Heard About This Great Job’
Your ex might want to read a text from you saying that you heard about an awesome job that could be his dream one. Maybe you can help him out and refer him for a position that you heard about.
If you two are on good terms, there’s no reason not to send this text message.
5. Never Send: ‘I’m Still Annoyed With You’
If you ever want to text your ex that you’re annoyed with him, that’s not a great idea. You also don’t want to text something that continues the argument that you had or whatever caused the breakup.
This will just start a fight or make him upset, and that’s not that productive, right?
4. Never Send: ‘Did I Leave Any Stuff At Your Place?’
If you text your ex that you wonder if you left anything at his apartment, he’ll be able to tell that you’re looking for an excuse to get in contact with him.
If he’s a decent person, he’ll definitely let you know if you did leave stuff there, so this is kind of unnecessary.
3. Never Send: ‘How’s Work Going?’
This isn’t the best text message to send, either. He’ll be confused that you’re getting in touch with him and he won’t want to tell you too many details.
After all, you’re not together anymore, so you both need to find other people to talk to regularly and confide in.
2. Want To Read: ‘I Just Wanted To See How You’re Doing’
Did you break up on friendly terms? Maybe it’s been a while and you really are curious about how he’s doing. It’s totally okay to check-in and it’s okay to ask him about his life these days.
He’s going to appreciate it and he’ll want to know how things are going for you too, for sure.
1. Want To Read: ‘I Miss You’
Your ex-boyfriend might actually want to read a text from you that says that you miss him. If you really think that you have a chance of getting back together, why not go for it and take a chance?
You never know… he could be waiting to hear this from you, and maybe he was too shy to text you the same thing.
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