He pursued me, then suddenly stopped.”
If there’s one thing that men like, it is the chase. They love it when you play hard to get and it makes them want you even more. Yes, we women enjoy it too. But what happens when they suddenly get tired of the chase and decide to move on? When he pursued you, there was slight teasing, you played hard to get and wanted him to pursue you just a bit more. You felt that everything was going well while you played the game of chase with him when suddenly he stopped chasing you.
When it comes to love, dating, and relationships, it is so hard to guess what the other person wants. The moment you feel that it is leading somewhere, he stops pursuing you, leaving you clueless about what happened.
The first question is how does a man pursue a woman? If he always initiates conversations, talks about meeting up, responds to your texts at lightning speed, gives you small surprises, then these are the sure-shot signs he is pursuing you, or in your case, “was pursuing you”. You feel that something has suddenly gone off about him and he doesn’t chase you like he used to before.
You want him to pursue you now but are worried that it’s too late. If you really like this guy a lot and want him back, you need to first identify the reasons why he has suddenly stopped chasing you. It could be nothing, but it’s better to get it cleared out before it’s too late. Here are 10 reasons why he suddenly stopped chasing you.
1. He feels that you’re not into him
When a woman constantly turns a man down, they begin to think that the woman isn’t interested in him. They don’t want to sound all clingy and desperate in front of the woman and begin to feel that it is time they stopped chasing a woman who isn’t into him. Men like the chase, but when the chase gets difficult, they tend to chicken out, at times concluding that the girl is out of his league. If you are among the women, who have turned him down more than once, it means that the guy feels that you’re not into him. This isn’t the time to keep thinking about, “Why he stopped chasing me?”, but about, “How to get him to ask me out again?”
2. He feels like a rebound
Many times, when a man starts pursuing a woman who has just come out of a serious relationship, they feel that the woman is keeping them hanging because she wants him to be her rebound. He spots the signs of being a rebound, and he backs off. He doesn’t feel like he belongs there and realizes that pursuing someone who has just got out of a serious relationship was a big mistake.
3. He’s dating other people
Twenty-First Century dating is more about keeping all options open, weighing the pros and cons, instead of looking for cupid to strike you with an arrow. If this guy has suddenly stopped chasing you, there are chances that he’s dating other people or has found someone else more compatible. Of course, pursuing you does not translate into being exclusive with you!
You might have thought that he was exclusive but that was probably not the case. For him, the meaning of commitment might have been different from yours. If he’s dating other people, it’s time to move on.
4. He feels like a backup
Many people like to have backups. Backups are people which one person keeps to fill a void or when things get lonely. They know that their backup will always be there at their beck and call and thus prefer to keep them hanging. You may not be one of those women, who keeps men as their backup but if this guy has experienced being someone’s backup before, then he might feel so. He may read signs that he is your backup plan. If you are unintentionally keeping him away from your personal life, he might feel that you don’t consider him important enough to be a part of it. Making him a part of your life will solve this problem.
5. He doesn’t see it going anywhere
You might be wondering why he suddenly stopped pursuing me? After chasing you and trying to impress you for some time, he might realize that it isn’t going anywhere. He might be going around in circles without any actual results. If you were playing hard to get too much, he might have got the wrong signals and thought that you weren’t interested in moving it forward. A guy doesn’t like waiting for too long, they prefer in getting clear signals instead. Once he is tired of waiting, he will stop pursuing you and move on.
6. You’re a control freak
How you behave before getting into a relationship has a lot to do with men pursuing you. Men usually like to do all the planning. They like to lead with things and surprise their loved ones. If you’re a control freak and have taken control of things even before getting into a relationship, you’ve probably scared him away. He pursued you because he was attracted to you, but on seeing how fast you’re taking it without even asking him, is the thing that has probably scared him off.
This guy pursued you, went out with you for some time and you thought that it was finally leading somewhere. Before anything significant happening, this guy suddenly chickens out like Chandler in the first four seasons of Friends. There are high chances that this guy is scared of commitment. If you really like this guy and think that something could really happen, talk to him and see how he feels about commitment. If he admits to having commitment issues, take it a bit slow.
8. He’s not interested in you anymore
If a man is interested, he will pursue you but when he realizes that he’s not interested anymore, he will decide to move on. Well, this is just how dating works. When a person is interested, he/she will pursue you to get to know you on a personal level. You either hit it off or you don’t. If he doesn’t feel a connection or feels like you aren’t someone he sees himself with, then he’ll stop pursuing you.
If he’s a gentleman, he will own up and tell you that things weren’t working out. But if he has stopped chasing you without telling you, you know what to call him.
9. His deadline has ended
Most men have a mental deadline when it comes to chasing women. It is because they don’t like chasing women for too long. They prefer in living in the moment rather than leaving it on fate to make something work. If you’ve kept him hanging for too long and he’s suddenly stopped chasing you, it means that his deadline has ended. He doesn’t want to keep chasing something that has a dead end and is thinking about moving on from you.
10. He has found someone else
Men stop chasing someone or put a halt to their chasing when they find out that someone else is into them. He could have also fallen for someone else instead. Your guy might have grown tired of waiting around and in the process might have found someone else. If he has been avoiding your calls and texts and is making excuses and ignoring you for someone else, then rest assured he has made his choice and you can’t do much about it.
When a man chases you, it is because he wants to prove his worth to you. He likes playing chase but when he doesn’t get the response that he was hoping for, he feels like it’s better to move on instead. If you really like this guy and are thinking that, “He stopped chasing me, but I want him”. There is some damage control that you can do. You might be tempted to taking him on a guilt trip or making him jealous, but the best thing to do is to talk to him openly about it. Knowing his side will help you understand the situation and clear misunderstandings if any.
If he’s still into you, you’ll be able to start things again and if he’s not, you will get some closure and will finally be able to move past it.
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