Tales of Rock – The Best Band You Never Heard – The Dead Daisies

The Dead Daisies are an Australian-American rock band and musical collective supergroup formed in 2013 in Sydney, Australia by David Lowy. Musicians that have joined Lowy for the project have included Richard Fortus (Guns N’ Roses), Jon Stevens (INXSNoiseworks), Darryl Jones[1] (The Rolling Stones), Dizzy Reed (Guns N’ Roses), Marco Mendoza (Thin LizzyWhitesnake), Charley Drayton (The CultDivinylsCold Chisel), John Tempesta (The Cult), Frank Ferrer (Guns N’ Roses), Alex Carapetis (Nine Inch Nails), Clayton DoleyJackie Barnes (Jimmy Barnes), John Corabi (The ScreamMötley Crüe), Alan Mansfield, Brian Tichy (Whitesnake, ForeignerOzzy Osbourne), Doug Aldrich (Whitesnake, Bad Moon RisingDioBurning RainRevolution Saints),[2] Deen Castronovo (JourneyBad EnglishHardline, Ozzy Osbourne, Revolution Saints) and Glenn Hughes (TrapezeDeep PurpleBlack SabbathBlack Country Communion).

You can see the whole story here:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dead_Daisies

I love this song!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, share, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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Aerosmith – Part 1

Philadelphia, PA – 1976-1977

I’ve wanted to write this for a while. Aerosmith is to American hard rock as Star Wars is to SciFi. I’ve loved Aerosmith since I was 13 years old. I’ve not only purchased nearly every album they’ve ever released, but I’ve also bought the same records in different formats. Vinyl, cassette, and CD. So I’ve made all of the payments necessary to this band as a fan.

I’m not going to review them as a band, or as a professional music reviewer. These are my personal opinions based on how old I was, how the music made me feel, what was going on in my life at the time, and what I felt were quality songs. If you want real history on this band, go buy a book or read online about them. I’m not going to get into personalities or anything about the inner workings of this group because that’s not what this is about.

Let’s face it, it’s not the guys, it’s what they did for you and how their music made you feel. I feel I’m warranted to say all of the following things because I’ve made all of the donations I’m ever going to make to this band’s bank accounts by buying their records and seeing them live. I love them, and will always love them for the decades of joy they’ve brought to my heart.

Sometimes I will be harsh with my words, but it comes from a place of pure love. So let’s get started.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aerosmith

Aerosmith – Debut album – 1973

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Aerosmith_(album)

My older sister hung out with a neighborhood band back in 1975/1976. They were called The Grim Reaper. I think because they played that song by Blue Oyster Cult. They also played the song, Dream On’ by Aerosmith and she must have liked that song because she brought this record home. I had heard that song played on the radio for several years but didn’t think much of it or even knew who did it. I was too buried in my love for the band Steppenwolf.

Tales of Rock – Steppenwolf – First Love

Let’s start with the cover of this album. I’ll run through this from left to right. This is a pretty furry band. What’s with Joey Kramer’s mutton chops? Then we have Joe Perry looking like Injun Joe from Twain’s book, Tom Sawyer. Tom Hamilton looks like he cut his hair with kid’s scissors and a razor blade. Steven Tyler looks kinda cool. Brad Whitford looks like a girl no one ever wants to date, let alone be seen with.

Wildwood, New Jersey – 1977

On a side note, the name Injun Joe came from this kid named Tony Riccardi. He was this guy that met my older sister and fell in love with her in the summer of 1977. He would be sniffing around our house trying to get her to go to the beach or take her out on a date and she just wasn’t into him. He was a moderately good-looking Italian guy about a year or so older than me. He was fit and I didn’t get why she wasn’t into him. Except for the fact that he seemed to only own one bathing suit. It was this dark blue and yellow striped speedo-looking thing he wore every day. Sis wasn’t into him, but I got to know him and he seemed nice. We started hanging out a little bit. But I’m thinking now he may have been just spending time with me to get to my sister. Distract the brother, bag the sister.

I noticed he was missing the pinky on his one hand. I asked him about it and he told me that he lost it in a bane saw accident in woodshop at school. My friends and I had all taken woodshop in school and heard all of the horror stories, myths, and legends about mishaps in wood and metal shop at our collective schools, but we never met anybody that some stuff had actually happened to. Tony Riccardi was that man. All that was left of the digit was a little knuckle.

I remember we were sitting in Sam’s Pizza and he asked our waitress for a pen. She gave it to him and went back to waiting tables. “What are you going to do with that?”

“Watch this.”

When the waitress returned to retrieve her pen, Tony asked her if she wanted to meet Herbie.

“Umm… okay.”

Tony held out his fist to her. On the little pinky knuckle stub, he had drawn a smiley face with her pen. He could actually wiggle it and make it say hi.

The waitress turned away in revulsion.

“Ton… I think I’m starting to get why my sister doesn’t want to date you.”

Anyway, Tony Riccardi was the person who upon viewing my records, saw the Aerosmith cover and called Joe Perry, Injun Joe. I never forgot that because he looks dead-on like an angry or sad native American from popular literature.

When you’re 14 years old every guy who is older than you looks like a grown man. All of the guys in Aerosmith were only in their early 20’s but to me, they might have well been in their 30’s.

The album had modest sales and I suppose they had to put, Featuring: “Dream On” on the jacket so people would say, Oh yea, that song’s pretty good.

I was in our basement listening to records on my dad’s stereo and shooting pool on our billiard table. One of the records I put on that day was this one. I’m going to go through this song by song. (Don’t worry, I’ll be brief.)

Make It: Great song. A kick-ass opening and it felt like it was about becoming a rockstar, so I was down.

Somebody: Another great song. Loved it more than Make It.

Dream on: Already tired of it by then.

One Way Street: Great jam song where I got to hear the different guitar playing styles by Joe and Brad. Also some fine harmonica work by Steven.

Mama Kin: Another solid rocker. Yes, I like this song too!

Write Me: I wrote letters to girls back then so I could relate because getting letters from girls in the mail was a big deal back then. Great song.

Movin’ Out: Not bad. It has its moments. (I always liked the little laugh in the beginning)

Walkin’ the Dog: They didn’t write it, but it’s a sweet little closer for the record. My mom loved this song.

This record got me really interested in this band. It was like Steppenwolf, but harder and faster. I really liked the songs and how they made me feel. I was beginning to have some real love for this band.

I eventually learned how to play nearly every song on this album on guitar. But that wouldn’t happen for another 2 years.

Let’s move on.

Philadelphia, PA – 1976.

I was in the garage with my friend Michael and we were listening to various records on my little green and white record player. We were listening to Bill Cosby, George Carlin, and some other rock music records. Out of all my friends back then, Michael was probably my best friend. He was a year younger than me, but we just sort of worked as friends. He lived a few doors down and wasn’t like the other kids in the neighborhood. We had some great times together and were super close. I felt bad for him because unlike me with my zit face Mike had full-blown acne. That’s different. That scars your face for life. Also, his parents never got his teeth fixed and he always had an overbite. I never understood that. but we were good buddies and at some point, I want to write about our adventures together.

I had the first Aerosmith album and we were listening to that and smoking cigarettes. I asked him if his brother Jimmy had any more Aerosmith albums. He said he had this one and their second record. I asked him what it was called.

Mike: “Get Your Wings.”

Me: “I don’t want to listen to Paul McCartney and Wings right now, besides it’s my sister’s and she probably doesn’t want me bringing it out to the garage.”

Mike: “What?”

Me: “What’s Aerosmith’s second record called?”

Mike: “I said, Get Your Wings.”

Me: “But I don’t want… wait, is that the name of the record? Get Your Wings?”

Mike: “I’ve been trying to tell you…”

Me: “That’s a crap name for a record, but yea… go get it. I want to hear it!”

Get Your Wings – 1974

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Get_Your_Wings

So here we are.

Okay, again with the cover. Joe looks cool. Joey Kramer actually looks the most handsome and rugged in the band. Steven looks hungover and on drugs, and why is he showing off his bulge? Brad looks sad or stoned. (Understandable) Tom Hamilton has let his razor cut grow out and looks presentable. (and a bit, impish!) It looks like the title for the record was an afterthought because it’s just this little lame phrase slapped on the cover like a little sticker. Look at it! Crap.

Michael returned with the record. Let’s run down the playlist. But before I do, let me say this. You have your whole life to write your first album. If you get signed to a label by some miracle, you have to come up with 8 to 10 more songs by the next year. Super pressure, and frankly I don’t know how bands did it back then, but maybe that’s why I never ended up in that vocation.

Aerosmith was a relatively new inexperienced act that had some magic between them. I later heard that they brought in some hired guns to play on the album to punch up the tracks but that’s not what this story is about.

Same Old Song and Dance: Cool opening track. Joe always had a knack for coming up with cool riffs and he definitely hits it on this one. A solid opening rocker. I liked it.

Lord of the Thighs: A little long and slow for me back then. But Brad Whitford plays some killer guitar on that tune. I later grew to like this song because of its theme and my adoration of women’s legs.

Spaced: Ahh… it is the title. A little spacey and kind of a dated-sounding song at this point. I wasn’t feeling it. But it has a cool psychedelic late 60’s vibe.

Woman of the World: Too long and lame. It’s a throwaway song that finishes side one, and I just never felt it no matter what it did.

S.O.S Too Bad: They used to play this a lot in concert and I never understood why. Maybe it was to get it out of the way to get to the good songs. Never liked it.

Train Kept a Rollin’: This is a retread of an old Yardbirds tune. They must have performed it live as a young band and people liked it. But I will say this, It’s a great rendition of the song, and Aerosmith went on to make it their own. Their live version is an incredible song and I love it. We played this song in my first band, Renegade so there’s that.

Seasons of Wither: This is the most beautiful song on the album. I love this song. (Renegade played this too) It’s a lovely song and the arrangement is gorgeous. I loved that although I loved Aero for the way they made me feel with the energy, this song was gentle and really touched me. Steven really touched the melancholy sound of the song. Oh god, and the strings on the cello on the second chorus. Bliss!

Pandora’s Box: This is a piece of trash song written by Joey Kramer that is about cunnilingus. It’s cheap and obvious and it’s clear they were out of songs for this record to produce this turd.

To sum up, Same Old Song and Dance. Cool song with a good Perry riff, and good lyrics. Train Kept a Rollin’, very exciting song. Seasons of Wither. Gorgeous.  That’s it for this record. I’m just going to talk about what was happening at the time, and how the songs made me feel.

At this point, I love the first record, but I’m not thrilled with the sophomore effort of this band.

But there is definitely something happening here with this new band.

Tune in next Thursday for the next chapter of the 9 part series!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

You can check out my books here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

The Weirdest, Creepiest and Most Annoying Songs of the 70’s – Part 3

If you were like me in the 1970’s you listened to top 40 radio most of the time. You heard a lot of great songs and instant classics. But among them were many unforgettable songs that were just weird or strange. I’ve tried from memory to remember the ones that stand out in my mind.

For weird reasons they became hits. They either made no sense or having any musical merit. Just a bizarre era of story songs.

Of course, this stuff is all pretty subjective but I did have a few criteria for what should be here. I decided to include a song if it:

    • made me sick without even listening to it again
    • made me want to break my radio
    • made my stomach turn
    • brought out violent thoughts of hatred, revenge, etc.
    • reminded me how lame the radio and record companies are
    • could make me want to break my stereo
    • would make me leave a bar or club if they started playing it
    • would make me boo a band who started playing it
    • suspended my belief in a divine force that governs the universe
I’m not saying that there weren’t ANY good songs during the 70s but there was just a truck-load of waste back then. If anybody’s stupid enough to think that ALL disco sucks, remember that it’s just a bastard son of rhythm & blues just like rock’n’roll is- so they’re related, see? Also, the 1970s definitely didn’t have a monopoly on shitty music- there was tons of crap unleashed on us in the decade before and after and now also (there’s a future article there somewhere). Clothes-pin anyone?

The 70’s was an interesting time for music. There was a lot of experimentation and creativity from that decade, but there was also plenty of crap as well. Here is my list of the worst and most irritating songs of the 70’s.

 

White Plains – My Baby Loves Lovin’ – 1970

White Plains is such an appropriate name for this band. They’re white and they’re plain, which also applies to the music. Just look at the title of their big US hit, My Baby Loves Lovin’. Total genius. And it’s as creative as the title suggests a.k.a it’s one of the most generic, cookie-cutter love songs the 70s have crapped out.

My baby loves love
My baby loves lovin’
She’s got what it takes
And she knows how to use it

My baby loves love
My baby loves lovin’
She’s got what it takes
And she knows how to use it

That was the chorus, BTW.”My girl loves the act of loving.” How riveting. The instrumentation is just as cookie-cutter, utilizing the safest, non-threatening sounds from the decade. People who complain about today’s music sounding the same should go back and listen to garbage like this and realize that the pop charts have always pushed mediocrity.

The New Seekers – Look What They’ve Done To My Song – 1970

The 70s didn’t just have boring stuff, it also had a LOT of weird stuff, too. The kind of weird stuff that made you question what the hell people were thinking at the time until you think about the copious amount of drugs they consumed. Exhibit A: Look What They’ve Done To My Song, Ma, a cover to a Melanie Safka’s What Have They Done To My Song, Ma. It starts off as a typical acoustic guitar ballad before being accompanied by a cheap accordion. It’s always going to sound like a joke, even when it’s supposed to be serious. Every time I hear this song, I hear nothing but background music for a French film. And that’s one of several musical elements that are in the song that don’t mesh with one another. I don’t even know what they did to this song, ma.

Bobby Sherman – Julie, Do Ya Love Me – 1970

Wow. Here’s a song that could’ve only existed in the 70s, Bobby Sherman’s Julie, Do Ya Love Me. Just listen to that messy instrumentation and try to picture it being made outside of the 70s. With that, being dated isn’t the reason why this song is on the list. No, it’s on the list because of the writing and content. Mr. Sherman here is feeling down because he had to leave his girl, whose name is Julie. What should sound romantic ends up being lame and schmaltzy. This dude was apparently a heartthrob back in the days. If there’s anything that pop music history has taught us, it’s that women would throw themselves at any pretty boy, no matter the quality of their music. Just a Tiger Beat cover boy.

Brotherhood of Man – United We Stand – 1970

You ever looked at a song title/artist name and expected one thing, but got something completely different? Well, that’s the feeling I had when I came across a song called United We Stand by The Brotherhood Of Man. I was expecting a protest song from a multi-racial group, but instead, we got a schmaltzy, pseudo-gospel declaration of love from a bunch of white folks. Look, there’s nothing wrong with the message. I can get behind it because the world does need more love. But I find this to be some cornball, sanitized trash. This is Sunday school music with all references to God and Jesus removed. Look, I appreciate the message and the fact that it resonates with some people, but I’m gonna have to pass on this one.

Check out the host of this music show. Where did they get this husk? Did they roll him out of mothballs to be on the show? Also, is this the ugliest band ever? Who chose that wardrobe? Awful!

Eddie Holmes – Hey There Lonely Girl – 1969 (I know, it’s not the 70s but it was played in the 70s non-stop)

I’ve said in the past that R&B was one of the best parts of 70s music (which I still stand by), BUT that doesn’t mean all of it was good. Just look at Hey There Lonely Girl by Eddie Holman. The instrumentation is alright, but then there’s Eddie Holman’s voice. Dear Lord Beerus, this dude’s voice. He has one of those ear-piercing falsettos that sounds like a chain-smoking Mickey Mouse. Every high note he hits is so shrill that I can’t listen to the song on headphones. (My ears are bleeding!) In the writing, the dude has his eyes on a girl whose boyfriend broke her heart and he offers to be her new boyfriend. Yeah, that’s not generating Treat You Better vibes at all. If I ever hear this song on an R&B station, I’m pressing skip immediately.

The Pipkins – Gimme Dat Ding! – 1970

Gimme Dat Ding by The Pipkins. What the flying hell did I just listen to? Was this a rejected song from an old 30s cartoon? This is what people at the time bumped in the whip? Two dudes going back and forth, one of them sounding like Popeye the Sailor Man while the other one keeps saying Gimme Dat Ding over and over on top of a honky-tonk piano. What is the ding, anyway? Is that another way of saying “pass the blunt?” Is it a brand of beer? “What you want?” “Gimme dat ding, please.” Is it sex? Considering that both performers are men, that’s kinda progressive for the 70s. Who knows? All I know is that I don’t want to hear it again. Gimme Dat Ding, another novelty hit that left me puzzled. Why in the world was this ever recorded? They must have known that there were bands called the Beatles, The Rolling Stones, and Led Zeppelin were in existence at the time. Why a vaudeville number?

Ronnie Dyson – (If You Let Me Make Love To You, Then) Why Can’t I Touch You? – 1970

Never has there been a song that raised so many questions before I started listening to it. The full title to Ronnie Dyson’s big hit is (If You Let Me Make Love To You, Then) Why Can’t I Touch You? Wouldn’t making love to someone involve physical contact? Are they having Amish sex where they bang with sheets between them? Are they having phone sex? Ghost sex? Are they screwing using telepathy or telekinesis? Do they use one of those devices from Demolition Man? What does it all mean?

Tiny Tim – Tiptoe Through The Tulips – 1968

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tiny_Tim_(musician)

Tiptoe Through the Tulips“, also known as “Tip Toe Through the Tulips with Me”, is a popular song published in 1929. The song was written by Al Dubin (lyrics) and Joe Burke (music) and made popular by guitarist Nick Lucas. On February 5, 1968, singer Tiny Tim made the song a novelty hit by singing it on the debut episode of the popular American television show Rowan and Martin’s Laugh-In.

Tim sings the song in the style of a woman singing the song in 1929! But he looks so weird and creepy doing it. It’s amazing the man had the career he did. It’s just so bizarre I had to add it to my list!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

You can check out my books here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

Tales of Rock – The Best Band You Never Heard – Band Maid

BAND-MAID Shop

Band-Maid (stylized as BAND-MAID and formerly as BAND-MAID® until March 2016) is a Japanese rock band formed in 2013. The band combines a rock sound with a maid image modeled on Japanese maid cafés.[9] Originally signed to Gump Records (an imprint of the Platinum Passport artist management and talent agency), they switched to major label Nippon Crown‘s sub-label Crown Stones in 2016 and later moved to new sub-label Revolver Records in 2019. For international releases they have been with JPU Records since 2016.

Band-Maid on Amazon Music

Band-Maid’s image is modeled on maid café hostesses, with the standard uniform adapted to match each member’s personality.[10] In interviews, they explained the concept came from founding member Miku Kobato who had previously worked at a maid café in Akihabara.[12] This theme is reinforced by the band, who refer to their male fans as “masters,” their female fans as “princesses,” and their concerts as “servings.”[50] The band’s “submissive” maid appearance is meant to contrast with their aggressive rock style.[10][51] They decided to have two vocalists to allow a larger variety of music with two different voice types.[12]

BAND-MAID New Album Releasing on December 2019 - Creatinity World

500+ Band Maid ideas in 2020 | maid, japanese girl band, band

Kobato loved Japanese enka music when she was a child, and Tokyo Jihen led her to rock.[52] She attended a vocal school around 2012, but started playing guitar with the formation of Band-Maid the following year.[53] Atsumi started singing when she was 14 and Band-Maid is her first band. Tōno is a big fan of Carlos Santana, has played classical piano since she was a child, and began playing guitar when she joined her high school band club. Hirose is a fan of Deep Purple and Maximum the Hormone, particularly the latter’s female drummer Nao Kawakita, and also played trombone and piano. Misa likes Paz Lenchantin,[52] The Smashing Pumpkins and Jimi Hendrix; she started playing piano at around 3 or 4 years of age, and also played trumpet, alto horn, and guitar.[10][12][50]

Just Bring It: An Interview with BAND-MAID - A-to-J Connections

Pin on Pr0n

English Translation :
Breaking New Gate
I raise the volume within my earphones
So that the dull noises will be erased
Those guys are waiting for the chance to trip and fall
Hey you, I shall let you hear this
This world is always faulty
I’ll be out of control if I just standstill
Even if these rampaging feelings of mine gets abused
I don’t care, just step forward
I’ve gotta be on my way (HEY!!)
On this symmetric flat road, I can’t find any interest in it
Just breakin’ new gate (HEY!!)
Regret means escaping from the hand of evil’s conspiracy
With the thrills, the greatest pleasure of all, I live on
I always see the scenery I don’t want to see
Imprisoned in a room of four walls
A dove creates an arc on such a small sky
Who are you, as I look above
The struggle seems to be real and steady
Even I self-affix myself, I’ll still go out of control
If I can’t be saved by tears
Just enjoy and savor it!
I’ve gotta be on my way (HEY!!)
I should be changing, these unanswered fears into madness
Just breaking new gate (HEY!!)
Tear up and throw away the erased blank pages
To what lies beyond my resolve, along with thrills, I devote my body
This world is always faulty
I’ll be out of control if I just standstill
Even if these rampaging feelings of mine gets abused
I don’t care, just step forward
I’ve gotta be on my way (HEY!!)
On this symmetric flat road, I can’t find any interest in it
Just breakin’ new gate (HEY!!)
Regret means escaping from the hand of evil’s conspiracy
This greatest pleasure of all, gets me going
To what lies beyond my resolve, along with thrills, I devote my body
Now listen to what these ladies can do!
This band kicks ass!

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

You can check out my books here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

The Weirdest, Creepiest and Most Annoying Songs of the 70’s – Part 2

If you were like me in the 1970’s you listened to top 40 radio most of the time. You heard a lot of great songs and instant classics. But among them were many unforgettable songs that were just weird or strange. I’ve tried from memory to remember the ones that stand out in my mind.

For weird reasons they became hits. They either made no sense or having any musical merit. Just a bizarre era of story songs.

Of course, this stuff is all pretty subjective but I did have a few criteria for what should be here. I decided to include a song if it:

    • made me sick without even listening to it again
    • made me want to break my radio
    • made my stomach turn
    • brought out violent thoughts of hatred, revenge, etc.
    • reminded me how lame the radio and record companies are
    • could make me want to break my stereo
    • would make me leave a bar or club if they started playing it
    • would make me boo a band who started playing it
    • suspended my belief in a divine force that governs the universe
I’m not saying that there weren’t ANY good songs during the 70s but there was just a truck-load of waste back then. If anybody’s stupid enough to think that ALL disco sucks, remember that it’s just a bastard son of rhythm & blues just like rock’n’roll is- so they’re related, see? Also, the 1970’s definitely didn’t have a monopoly on shitty music- there was tons of crap unleashed on us in the decade before and after and now also (there’s a future article there somewhere). Clothes-pin anyone?

The 70’s was an interesting time for music. There was a lot of experimentation and creativity from that decade, but there was also plenty of crap as well. Here is my list of the worst and most irritating songs of the 70’s.

 

Torn Between Two Lovers – Mary Macgregor – 1977

This is a song written by Peter Yarrow (of the folk music trio Peter, Paul & Mary) and Phillip Jarrell. The song describes a love triangle and laments that “loving both of you is breaking all the rules”. Mary MacGregor recorded it at Muscle Shoals Sound Studio in 1976. The song became the title track of her first album.

“Torn Between Two Lovers” reached No. 1 on both the U.S. pop chart in February 1977 as well as the Easy Listening chart in the final week of 1976 and the first week of 1977. It also reached No. 1 on the Canadian charts. The song also peaked at No. 3 on the country charts of both nations. In March 1977, the song peaked at No. 4 in the United Kingdom.

I think the use of the word, “torn” is what always bothered me about this song. I’m not alone here. I had a girlfriend in the 80’s who felt the same way. That title conjured up some sort of DP coupling between the singer and two dudes. However, I like the idea of someone being in love with two different people for different reasons. I’ve been there several times myself, but it’s just an odd song.

If you really listen to this song and read the lyrics, this chick is obviously married, and she’s already cheated on her husband. She decides to tell him, and it feels a bit too graphic. This other guy knows he can’t own her, but he can fill a place that’s been empty for a while and only he can fill it. So the sex and romance have definitely dropped off in her current relationship. She doesn’t love her husband any less but this other dude is delivering the D on the reg, and she’s digging it. She should have just left well alone and rode it out, but what do I know? It’s a sweet song about cheating and adultery. Nice.

A  sad song that’s a little gross.

Sing a Song – The Carpenters – 1973

is a 1971 song written by Joe Raposo for the children’s television show Sesame Street as its signature song. In 1973, it gained popularity when performed by the Carpenters, who made it a #3 hit on the Billboard Hot 100.

Raposo was one of the staff songwriters on Sesame Street, and the song became one of the most popular on the program, sung in English, Spanish, and sign language. In its initial appearance, it was sung by adult human cast members of the show (the most frequent lead singer was Bob McGrath) and Muppets, including Big Bird.

I will say this. I love the sound of Karen Carpenter’s voice. That low, contralto is like honey to me.

But this song is pure drivel. Then again, this seemed to be the decade for such saccharine-laden happy-happy songs—see the previous selections plus “Candy Man” by Sammy Davis Jr., and “Playground in My Mind” by Clint Holmes (“My name is Michael/I got a nickel…”)

When I hear this song, I want to drive knitting needles into my ears. It doesn’t make me want to throw up because we all know what can happen if you do that all of the time.

Sorry, Karen.

You’re Sixteen – Ringo Starr – 1974

Is that a kazoo I hear in this song? Really, dude? You’re sixteen, you’re beautiful, and the 33-year-old guy singing this to you is a pervert. Nuff said.

Couldn’t you have picked any other song in the world, Ringo? I can imagine back in the 60s when you’d approach the other Beatles with a song you had composed. They’d congratulate you and then stick it to the refrigerator to show how proud of you they were. Then they’d get back to cranking out the greatest songs ever written.

I Just Want To Stop – Gino Vanelli – 1978

This is a song by Canadian singer/songwriter Gino Vannelli. Released as a single in August 1978, the song is his biggest hit single to date, reaching number one in his native Canada and number four on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100. It appears on his sixth album, Brother to Brother. The song was produced by the three brothers Gino, Joe, and Ross Vannelli, and written by Ross.

“I Just Want to Stop” by Gino Vanelli. It probably doesn’t deserve to be on this list (he barely eeked out masterpieces by Peaches and Herb, and Sean Cassidy), but I have a visceral reaction to this song: every time it comes on, I want to crash my car through the guardrail and plunge 3,000 feet to my death.

Precious and Few – Climax – 1972

This is a song recorded by the American group Climax which became a major North American hit in early 1972. Written by the band’s guitarist, Walter D. Nims, it spent three weeks at number three on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100 and hit number one on the Cash Box Top 100. It also reached number six on Canada’s RPM 100.

Lead vocals were provided by Sonny Geraci, who also sang lead on “Time Won’t Let Me” by his previous band, The Outsiders. Nims had also been a member of The Outsiders.

“Precious and Few” was released on Carousel Records in 1971. The song featured The Ron Hicklin Singers as backing vocalists, a piano, drums, strings, and a horn section.

Climax was mostly Sonny Geraci with some backing musicians to create this sappy, syrupy ballad. I also get tired of trying to explain that this song has nothing to do with the Climax Blues Band (aka Climax Chicago).

Kill me now.

Let ‘ Em In – Wings  – 1976

This one is bad. From its annoying opening to its simply awful baseline (one can practically feel the musicians falling asleep) to its trombone solo (trombone solo!) to its stupid flute riff to its inane lyrics, this song absolutely takes the cake. Side note: Why does everyone love McCartney? More than half of his hits are silly little love songs. (What’s wrong with that? Everything.) Hard to believe this turd fell from the mind of a Beatle.

Go ahead, have a listen. See if you disagree.

Dancing Queen – Abba – 1976

Musically, “Dancing Queen” is a Europop version of American disco music. As disco music dominated the US charts, the group decided to follow the trend, replicating Phil Spector’s Wall of Sound arrangements. The song alternates between “languid yet seductive verses” and a “dramatic chorus that ascends to heart-tugging high notes.” It features keyboard lines by Andersson, which accentuate the melody’s sophistication and classical complexity, while Ulvaeus and Andersson interlace many instrumental hooks in and out of the mix. Anni-Frid Lyngstad and Agnetha Fältskog’s layered vocals have been noted for their dynamism, “[negotiating] the Abba’s many turns flawlessly.”Lyrically, the song concerns a visit to the discotheque but approaches the subject from the joy of dancing itself. The music video on YouTube has over 456 million views as of November 2020 and has become ABBA’s most recognizable and popular song.

I hate this song and everything this singing group ever created. Not because my dad brought this music into our house one day. Because I just hate the way this music sounds. My dad first heard the song at a party where some woman who was employed at the bank where he worked was dancing to it. He liked what he heard and saw, and bought the record. He later carried on an affair with her, which was his usual MO during the 70s and early 80s. He told my sister that he liked the song because it made him think of her when she was dancing. Which was a bald-faced lie. I also hated that he liked the song, “I Am The Tiger from the album Arrival. I know for a fact he thought he was the living persona of that shitty song too, so more hate for Abba.

When I heard this horribly cold, processed music coming from his apartment I wanted to jump out a window and plummet to my death on the concrete below. This music is terrible, but the world loves them. At one point I remember reading that this band generated more revenue than Volvo.

I hate this music and I think my dad was a prick for lying to my sister and for all of his lascivious affairs while he was married to my mom.

So there you have it. Enjoy!

HATE!

Wildwood Weed – Jim Stafford – 1974

After my rage fest in regard to Abba, let’s close with this little ditty.

This is a 1974 hit song written by Don Bowman and recorded by Jim Stafford. It was the fourth of four U.S. Top 40 singles from his eponymous debut album. Musically, the song takes its inspiration from The Carter Family’s instrumental recording “Wildwood Flower”. The lyrics in the verses are spoken, rather than sung.

The song is a story about farmers who take a sudden interest in a common wildflower on their farm and soon discover and enjoy its hallucinogenic and mind-altering properties after one of them begins to chew on one. They begin to cultivate the plant in earnest; however, federal agents raid their property and destroy their crops. Nevertheless, the men are undeterred by the destruction of their plants, as they have saved a supply of seeds, overlooked by the agents.

“Wildwood Weed” reached number seven on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100, number five on Cash Box, and number three on the Canadian pop singles chart. It was a crossover hit onto the Adult Contemporary charts of both nations (reaching number two in Canada),] as well as the U.S. Country chart.

However, some AM radio stations banned the song because of its reference to marijuana. Funny and cute by today’s standards!

 

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