ANGEL WITH A BROKEN WING: Inspiration and Behind the Scenes – Part 3

I decided to go back in my memory and try to remember all of the inspiring moments in my own life that helped bring this book to life. I published Part 1 and 2 the last two Mondays, so you can check them out to gather more insight into the book. Anyway, here’s some more stuff…

The Conversations: The interesting dialogue between Christian and the people in his life all came out of my head for the most part. I originally envisioned Angel as a play. It was about two people on a long car ride. The play would focus on all of the cool conversations they have together on a road trip. I wanted the stories to be diverse and engaging. Back in the 90’s, what else was there to do on a long trip? Read a magazine, listen to the radio or simply talk. I liked the idea and as the story grew, I incorporated all of those clever exchanges into the story.

The Villain: Although I’m always rooting for the hero, the bad guys in movies and books are always more interesting than the good guys. When I think about it, the villain has his on perspective of right and wrong. Both parties think they’re right. Superman wants to save the world, but Lex Luthor has his own agenda. The villain in Angel simply wants what he believes is rightfully his, and will stop at nothing to get it. I can’t really blame him, but I don’t agree with his methods. He isn’t based on anyone I know. I just envisioned the classic man in black from modern folklore.

The Route: Back in 1982, I took a road trip from New Jersey to Los Angeles, in a 1969 Volkswagen mini bus. I was with my buddy Frank Roberts. It was February when we set out, so we took the most southern route. It was interstate 10. Remembering many of the details and stops on that trip, I was able to create a similar route for Christian and Jill. Knowing that road and those towns along the way, I was able to bring the trip to life in a realistic way.

The Wagon Wheel: That’s a restaurant that Chris and Jill dine in one day. The name of the place is from a song by the band, Morphine. It’s a song called Thursday. I love that whole album, (A Cure for Pain) The lyrics always seemed so clever and illicit, that I felt that the song deserved a mention. Here’s the lyrics:

We used to meet every Thursday Thursday
Thursday in the afternoon
For a couple of beers and a game of pool
We used to go to a motel a motel
A motel across the street
And the name of the motel was the Wagon Wheel
Oh
One day she said come on come on she said
Why don’t you come back to my house
She said my husband’s out of town
You know he’s gone till the end of the month
Well I was just so nervous so nervous
You know I couldn’t really quite relax
‘Cause I was never really quite sure when her
Husband was coming back
Sure one of the neighbors yea one of the neighbors
One of the neighbors that saw my car
And they told her yea they told her
I think they know who you are
Well her husband he’s a violent man a very violent and jealous man
Now I have to leave this town I got to leave while I still can
We should have kept it every Thursday Thursday
Thursday in the afternoon
For a couple of beers and a game of pool
We should have kept it every Thursday Thursday
Thursday in the afternoon
For a couple of beers and a game of pool
She was pretty good too
Source: LyricFind
Songwriters: Mark Sandman
Thursday lyrics © BMG Rights Management
I just liked the song so I worked the Wagon Wheel into the book.

New Orleans: Back in 1982, on my real road trip with Frank, we pretty much stayed on highway 10. But I remember the day we left Mobile, Alabama, Frank expressed that he wanted to take highway 12 down into New Orleans. I’m so glad we did that. You can actually read about our whole trip in the series: California Dreamin’ on this blog! Just enter that into the SEARCH box and you can read the whole sordid tale. It’s such a unique and wild place I had to include it into Angel. Did I jump onstage and play with a band in a bar down there? No. But it just had to be a stop for our heroes on their trip because it’s just a neat place. I think after we left there I described it as… Sodom and Gomorrah with a two drink minimum!

Sealy, Texas: That really happened. It wasn’t as bad as I made it in the book, (the roaches!) but the whole bit about the desk clerk, his coloring book and him chasing us in his car down a dirt road, really happened to Frank and I on our journey back in 1982. Difference was, I didn’t have a bulldog .44 pistol. But I did have Frank, who was formerly a member of the Junior wing of the IRA back in Belfast, Ireland. I’ll never forget when he leaped out of the car, with an ice pick in his hand to face the guy chasing us. I obviously changed it up for the book, but yea…true story.

The Car: When I first started writing this book, I thought what kind of car should they take on an odyssey across America. The 1959 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz came to mind. It’s an enormous automobile built for the open road. Can you imagine trying to parallel park that beast in the city? You’d never even find a spot for a car that size. Here’s a link to some more info:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cadillac_Eldorado

1959 Cadillac Eldorado Biarritz Convertible ...

It just seemed like the obvious choice for a long trip across the country. It looks like a 1950’s science fiction spaceship.  Who wouldn’t want to step on the gas and let that massive chrome boat carry you to parts unknown? There was a song I heard on WXPN in Philly, (public supported radio) by a band called Southern Culture on the Skids. There was a song called Voodoo Cadillac that opens the album. It’s some good old fashioned shit kickin’ rockabilly. I loved the idea of the title. So the character, Jean from Haiti was born, and he’s the one who brings the car back to life. As we all know Haiti is where voodoo comes from. I always like the movie, Serpent and the Rainbow, so that was an inspiration as well.

I always loved the car, and even bought a little toy one when I was in Palm Springs with my wife back in the 1990’s! (I still have it!)

The Police: The two officers that visit Christian and Jill in Texas were based on a couple of my childhood friends. Michael Mitchell was a kid I grew up with in Philly. His father was a cop and he became a police officer as well. He had a decorated career but sadly passed away in April of 2020. Richard Sarlo was my best friend in Wildwood New Jersey every summer. He always wanted to become a police officer. Through the years he rose up the ranks and eventually became the Chief of Police in Collingswood, New Jersey. He’s since retired and is living a happy life in South Jersey.

Scene in the Texas desert: The scene where Jill and Chris have to hang for a day in Texas because of the police investigation, was born from an old film. One of my least favorite Alfred Hitchcock movies, To Catch a Thief was the inspiration. It’s just Cary Grant and Grace Kelly riding a scooter in I the Italian countryside. She has a picnic lunch and I just loved the vibe of that scene so I sort of dropped that into the story. To me it’s a throwaway scene from a throwaway movie.

More to come next Monday!

 

Please buy my new book, Angel with a Broken Wing!

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

 

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

My new book, Angel with a Broken Wing is now for sale on Amazon!

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

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A Watershed Moment

A Watershed Moment is a turning point, the exact moment that changes the direction of an activity or situation. A Watershed Moment is a dividing point, from which things will never be the same. It is considered momentous, though a Watershed Moment is often recognized in hindsight.

But not today.

Happy Monday Everyone! Welcome to July 2020. 

It’s amazing to finally get a book you’ve working on published! Back on Valentine’s day of this year I was surprised when Phicklephilly the book, first appeared on Amazon. It was an exhilarating rush to finally have my work published.

 

When COVID-19 struck, it threw us all for a loop. But it opened up the opportunity to do the things we never had time to do. (Because we were all working!) I decided to compile and publish Crazy Dating Stories from my life. I put it out in three volumes on Amazon Kindle, and the Anthology on Kindle and paperback.

But as time went by, I felt the need to do something more. Something bigger. Something that wasn’t a non-fiction account of all of the crazy dates and relationships I’d been in.

I wanted to tell a story. Something that came from my mind and heart. The kind of book I would read.

…and Angel with a Broken Wing was born!

My publisher sent me author copies and I got them today! It’s funny… you write a book and get it published, and people buy it. They send you pictures of your book. It’s really nice to see that they bought it and that the book is selling.

But when you open the box that came in the mail, and you reach in and actually hold in your hands the thing that you made… The thing you created that wasn’t there before, it’s incredible. It’s no where near what I felt the day the nurse handed me my daughter for the first time… but it’s pretty darn good!

Thanks to everyone who supported me during this amazing journey. Thanks to my friends and family who patiently listened to me complain over and over about how much I hate editing. I’m so grateful to everybody at Amazon, AmazonKindle, WordPress, and GoDaddy. I couldn’t bring my stories to life without you guys!

I’m currently editing Phicklephilly 2, and I hope to have it out this Fall. I’m still debating whether I should publish Sun Stories: Tales from a Tanning Salon. There’s just so many moving parts to that book. If it does publish, it’ll be an enormous tome. I don’t know if I want that. I feel that some of those stories need to be told, but only time will tell. It would be a mad book because of all of the crazy stuff that happened there, but I just don’t know. It starts out innocent enough, but then becomes insane. I need to find its voice before I can even attempt to publish such an explosive expose’.

I’m also working on my second work of fiction. (Working title: Below the Wheel) It’s a hard boiled detective story that is nothing like Angel with a Broken Wing. I am in negotiations with a local artist for the cover. It needs a completely different look than Angel.

Once that’s completed, I’d like to write something heartfelt. I’ve always wanted to tell the quintessential summer at the seashore story. I’m not sure what that’s going to look like yet. I’m just going to let it flourish in my mind on it’s own over the next few months.

Anyway, I hope you’re all reading my Behind the Scenes mini series about Angel with a Broken Wing that publishes every Monday on Phicklephilly. It’s a revealing look into where all the ideas for the book came from.

The next book isn’t going to write itself, so I better get back at it. Before all of this all happened, I had short hair and no beard! Now, I’m approaching Big Lebowski territory! But based on my social media likes, the ladies dig it!

(Yea, that’s Jeff Buckley, Aerosmith and Farrah Fawcett behind me in my studio! Two dead, one band still alive and kicking. All beloved… and good inspiration!)

Thanks to everybody for getting us to 50,000 page views so far for 2020 on Phicklephilly! The blog wouldn’t exist without you! Also, a big thanks to all of the great companies that advertise on my site! I’ll keep generating solid content to support your brands. Kohls, Zipcar, Progressive, Geico, Duck duck go, and the rest!

Thanks for the revenue guys!

Alright! See you all tomorrow!

Charles

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

My new book, Angel with a Broken Wing is now for sale on Amazon!

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

ANGEL WITH A BROKEN WING is Now For Sale on Amazon! (kindle and paperback)

PUBLISHED!

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss

 

The day is finally here, and I couldn’t be happier! This has been a long time coming and a labor of love. I’ve been working day and night to get this baby written, and I think it’s my finest work yet! I hope you enjoy it!

 

I wanted to create something new. Not a non-fiction, compilation of stories from my blog. Something new. A story. A fable. A love story that included all of the elements of all the films I liked. A thriller, road movie, romance, mystery, an action yarn, that would be full of twists and turns.

The world had gone a bit mad, and I wanted to create a world I could control. I wanted it to take place in a time before there were smart phones or social media. A story about a boy and a girl trying to fall in love, during extraordinary circumstances. Let’s put a fancy car in there. Have them drive across the country on a road trip. Let’s throw a bad guy in there. That’ll keep them on edge. Let’s make it a mystery too. Let’s ‘David Lynch’ it up a bit with some interesting, unique characters. Let’s make them all flawed in some way. They all have the potential to be good, but they’re all struggling with themselves. They all want something, but they don’t know the right way to get it. A collection of misfits all trying to find themselves. All broken in some way. They want to fly, but their wings are broken, so they choose to run.

What if you could just run away from your current life?

Christian Blackmore works as a manager at a local finance company in New Jersey. He’s burned out from all the bad loans, and making collection calls every night. He spends his days laboring at a job he hates, and his evenings drinking at a local bar with his best friend. 

When his favorite uncle dies, and leaves him a unique inheritance, he begins to question the path he’s taken in life.

He decides to take a road trip across the country with a woman he just met. She’s a mysterious beauty, who may hold a dark secret. 

What begins as a romantic journey, becomes a nightmare, when he realizes he’s being followed by an elusive stranger. What does he want? Is it Christian, the girl, or something far more sinister?

Angel with a Broken Wing, takes you on a terrifying, coast to coast thrill ride across America. Can one man fall in love, and stay one step ahead in a cat and mouse game with a killer?

You can check it out here:

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss

 

I want to first thank my daughter. Thank you for coming into my life. You are my inspiration. I love you! I can always come to you with an idea and you make it perfect.

Scott Macintosh. You’re my best friend. You’ve been with me since the beginning. Thank you for staying on the ship, even when it was sinking. 

Will Ball. Thank you for your friendship, the films, the laughs, and of course, the cocktails. I’m honored to have you in my life as a friend. 

A.M. Homes. Thank you for answering my letter with a personal note so many years ago. I was so inspired by your words, it gave me the courage to write my story the way I wanted to tell it, without fear.

Thanks to the amazing team at Amazon Kindle. Without you, I’d be lost in a sea of technology. I can write the words, but you guys help me turn them into books.

Thanks to everyone at Amazon. I became a member over 20 years ago when you were just a giant bookstore. After crawling on my hands and knees to agents and publishing houses for years, Amazon finally gave me the biggest platform on Earth to bring my literary work to the world!

A special thanks to everyone at WordPress. Without you, I couldn’t publish Phicklephilly everyday for the last four years! Now we’re a dot com and I’ve monetized the site with ads! You gave me a home to bring my work to everyone! Thank you!

Thanks to all the folks over at GoDaddy. You made the transition from just another blogger, to a dotcom look easy. Thanks for always being there when I needed you. You’re the best!

Thank you, dear readers, and subscribers for all of your support over the years I’ve been writing this little blog. I appreciate you all, and try to respond to all of your comments. I love your comments!

Please buy my new book. I assure you, you won’t be disappointed. It’s quite a ride!

This is a great book to read at the beach this summer!

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy my new book, Angel with a Broken Wing on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

 

 

HAPPY FIRST DAY OF SUMMER, EVERYONE…EVERYWHERE!!!

 

Zoolon Forever!

My New Book, ANGEL WITH A BROKEN WING is Now on Sale at Amazon! (kindle & paperback)

Get it here:

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss

 

We’ve been in quarantine for months here in Philly. My daughter and I have been making the best of it. She’s been recording new music in our home studio, and I’ve been holed up in my office working on a book.

I like to work and be busy. But there’s been nowhere for us to go, since March 14th. Everything’s shut down. There was nothing we could do about it, but collect unemployment like the other 40 million people out of work in this country.

At first, we both slept in and enjoyed being off from work. It was a welcome repose from the daily grind of being on our feet all day, both working in restaurants in this city. I think we both had hangovers from working in a tough industry.

I remember putting in 55 hours a week at my last job, and some days thinking… “I wish this would all just stop.”

And it did.

It was like a miracle. It’s as if we rubbed a lamp and were granted just one simple wish.

I remember in the beginning, I rested and sometimes didn’t bathe because I suddenly didn’t have to be anywhere.

But after a week, I began writing like mad on my blog. I wanted to respond to what was happening with my words. I was posting up to 6 times a day just to give my readers content on ways to deal with these extraordinary circumstances.

I went to bed earlier, and woke up earlier. Most days between 7 and 8am. It was nice to want to see the day. The full day. I let my hair and beard grow. I liked that I started to resemble the Big Lebowski, or a fat Thor, from not having to be running around all the time.

I would get up early, shower, eat breakfast, run any errands needed for the house, and then write.

But something was itching at my brain. I needed to create something of value during this sudden vacation. A time where I didn’t HAVE to go to work to meet my obligations. My daughter felt the same. We both realized we couldn’t squander this gift.

Lorelei bought some special recording equipment and decided to start recording her own songs. She did a cover of a cool song by Doja Cat and she and her friend shot a video. Then she started working on an original composition. She wrote the lyrics and the music for a new song. Her song. An original composition.

I was blown away that this feat could be accomplished. Because I come from a world where I had to pay thousands of dollars to go into a studio to do the very same thing thirty years ago. But technology rocks!

I wanted to create something new. Not a non-fiction, compilation of stories from my blog. Something new. A story. A fable. A love story that included all of the elements of all the films I liked. A thriller, road movie, romance, mystery, action yarn that would be full of twists and turns.

The world had gone a bit mad, and I wanted to create a world I could control. I wanted it to take place in a time before there were smart phones or social media. A story about a boy and a girl trying to fall in love, during extraordinary circumstances. Let’s put a fancy car in there. Have them drive across the country on a road trip. Let’s throw a bad guy in there. That’ll keep them on edge. Let’s make it a mystery too. Let’s David Lynch it up a bit with some interesting, unique characters. Let’s make them all flawed in some way. They all have the potential to be good, but they’re all struggling with themselves. They all want something, but they don’t know the right way to get it. A collection of misfits all trying to find themselves. All broken in some way. They want to fly, but their wings are broken, so they choose to run.

You run away in an attempt to find yourself, but in the end, maybe you realize that what’s important, is you’ve been there the whole time.

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss

So I started writing this book. I worked on it every day. 7 days a week from 10am to around 7pm everyday. Literally keeping those restaurant hours without having to be on my feet.

I wanted to create something completely original. Not a collection of stories from all of my dating adventures here in Philly. Something born from my mind. That’s how, Angel with a Broken Wing came about!

What should the cover be? A picture of an old statue from ancient Rome with one of it’s wings broken off? No. A photo of a fallen angel? Please.

Then it struck me. How about a pen and ink drawing of the female lead wearing a white pashmina on her head and a cool pair of sunglasses? There she is, fresh from a sumptuous dinner with her romantic suitor in Palm Springs. It’s dusk in the California desert, and she looks at the horizon. The palm trees reflected in her sunglasses, she turns to him and allows him a kiss. Has she made a mistake?  Will she yield to him? Probably not… but maybe.

That could work for the cover. That could be the very essence of the book. So I decided to create the artwork for the cover myself.

But I drew that back in 1980, when I was 17 years old,and an art major in high school.

What if you could just run away from your current life?

Christian Blackmore works as a manager at a local finance company in New Jersey. He’s burned out from all the bad loans, and making collection calls every night. He spends his days laboring at a job he hates, and his evenings drinking at a local bar with his best friend. 

When his favorite uncle dies, and leaves him a unique inheritance, he begins to question the path he’s taken in life.

He decides to take a road trip across the country with a woman he just met. She’s a mysterious beauty, who may hold a dark secret. 

What begins as a romantic journey, becomes a nightmare, when he realizes he’s being followed by an elusive stranger. What does he want? Is it Christian, the girl, or something far more sinister?

Angel with a Broken Wing, takes you on a terrifying, coast to coast thrill ride across America. Can one man fall in love, and stay one step ahead in a cat and mouse game with a killer?

Get it here:

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss

 

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

My new book, Angel with a Broken Wing is available now on AMAZON!

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

Angel with a Broken Wing is Now on Sale at AMAZON

“What if you could just run away from your present life?”

I’ve been composing my first work of fiction.

It’s a romantic thriller, that takes the reader on a cross country odyssey across America.

A young gentleman meets a nice girl, and they decide to take a journey together.  Both wanting to escape their mundane lives.

What begins as an idyllic road trip, turns into a nightmare, as they discover they’re locked in a cross country, cat and mouse game with a mysterious stranger.

It’s a real corker of a story, so hopefully you’ll want to read it!

You can get it here:

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Angel With A Broken Wing, Now on sale on Amazon!

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

The Quarantine Has Given Us Time To Create

Nobody saw this coming.

But this unprecedented event has given us one thing we’ve all been complaining that we don’t have.

That thing is TIME.

You know longer have and excuse as to why you can’t start or finish anything.

Now you have nothing but time.

So in that time, I decided to gather every crazy dating story I’ve ever written into some sort of order.

This has yielded the following:

 

 

 

 

If you don’t feel like buying each volume, I’ve gathered all three volumes into one neat Anthology.

These are the craziest, most insane, hilarious, raunchiest, and most heartbreakingly embarrassing dates I’ve ever been on in my entire life.

After writing the book, Phicklephilly, this has been a labor of love to compile this crazy collection of stories from my life.

It’s been a joy to reread and edit these tales for your enjoyment. I appreciate your support and for reading this blog and reading my books.

You’ll laugh, you’ll cringe, and you’ll repeat these stories to your friends!

 

You can buy them all on Amazon now!

You will not be disappointed!

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

 

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

Crazy Dating Stories – Volume 1, is Now Available for Sale on Amazon

If you liked Phicklephilly, you’ll love Crazy Dating Stories. These are tales from the last 20 years of my dating life.

Phicklephilly the book, is a story about me moving to Philly and beginning my search for true love in our fair city.

Crazy Dating Stories is the most insane, irreverent, disgusting, and funny tales from my dating life. Everybody has stories like these, and I’d love to hear them. We’ve all been on a Date from Hell!

I went back into my history and dredged up the wildest, weirdest things that have ever happened to me while dating.

While writing and compiling these dating stories, I realized I’d been on so many I couldn’t fit them all into one book. So this is the first of a trilogy. I hope for my sake there’s never a Volume 4!

I’ve decided to make them available on Amazon Kindle and then eventually in paperback.

With everything going on with the Coronavirus and most of us having to stay home from work, now would be the time to grab a copy and get some good laughs at my expense!

You won’t be disappointed!

If anything, you’ll feel sorry for me. You’ll wonder, why did this guy hang in there as long as he did on these dates?

Now we know the answer.

To eventually get a funny story out of it!

 

You can buy it here:

 

 

MORE TO COME! 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly

Phicklephilly the BOOK is Available on Amazon! (Kindle and Paperback!)

“Love at first swipe! One man’s story of returning to Philadelphia in search of the perfect girlfriend. Will he succeed, or fail miserably in his quest to find love in this city? This is a funny and sometimes heart wrenching tale of a man trying to navigate the pitfalls of the modern dating world.”

Hey readers and beloved followers!

(That’s a pic of my dear friend Duncan’s dog, Cooper!)

I know I sent a message out a year and a half ago telling everyone my book was going to be published on Amazon. They said it takes 72 hours to review and create. That was almost 2 years ago.

I called Amazon Kindle last week and spoke with a charming woman named Teresa and she assured me that they would look into the problem. I loved it when she looked at my account and said my name and the title of the book. It was so nice to hear the title of my book announced over the phone by someone I never met.

Well, I just got word that I just published Phicklephilly, The Book… on Amazon! (for REAL this time. I promise!) And the craziest irony of all is, it was published on Valentine’s Day! How fitting!

The book is available for online purchase currently, in kindle and paperback editions.

Please buy my book. Know the secrets that are coming up in the blog before they happen! Will I find true love in the city of Philadelphia? All will be revealed in the book.

There will be more books.  I believe this could be the beginning of an ongoing series!

Thank you all for reading, commenting, and especially following my odyssey of romance!

Thanks to all of you for your support! (Yes! Finally reached my 2020 goal!)

You can buy it here:

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

 

 

 

 

21 of our Favorite Holiday Gag Gifts — All from Amazon

I love this crap!

Happy Holiday, Everyone!

 

A warning to those who leave their children unattended in cafes

unattendedchildren

Amazon

“Unattended children will be given espresso and a free kitten” sign, $12.99

Perfect for that friend who owns a cafe and just can’t figure out how to deal with the unbridled children of their caffeine-fiend clientele.

 

A (loudly) screaming goat figurine and booklet

screaminggoat

Amazon

“The Screaming Goat” book and figure, $7.55

If they still can’t get enough of that Screaming Goat video on YouTube, this is as blood-curdling — and annoying — as you might imagine. Trust me, I have one on my desk. My colleagues love me.

Blinker fluid, for the uninclined

blinker fluid

Amazon

Blinker Fluid, $6.95

We can all think of someone who this is for. Maybe they’ll get the message now.

The world’s smallest violin

violin

Amazon

3-Inch Miniature Violin Replica (with case), $11.98

Sorry, no pony this year, either, kiddo. Play it, momma.

A mock video game to drop the hint that it’s time they pull their weight around the house

extremechores

Amazon

Extreme Chores: Motion Controlled Video Game (empty box), $7.49

For little Lord Fauntleroy. Yeah, maybe coal didn’t quite get the message across, but this ought to do the trick. Note that this box comes empty, so you can also fill it with coal, if you so please.

Your face on a pair of socks

facesocks

Amazon

Custom Photo Face Socks, $15.59

Put the mug of their best friend (or worst enemy) on a pair of socks. Either way, they’ll wear them. Trust us.

For those who ask too many questions

'what if? Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions'

Amazon

“What If? Serious Scientific Answers to Absurd Hypothetical Questions,” $11.49

Great coffee table (or commode) material for the coveter of useless information.

Help them slow that little tyke down

toddler tamer gag

Amazon

Toddler Tamers (gag kit), $7.99

Parents, rejoice!

An ice cream lock, so they’ll stop blaming you for being the culprit

icecreamlock

Amazon

Ben & Jerry’s Euphori-Lock Ice Cream Lock, $24.19

For the stingy one who’ll never share their ice cream.

Poems by cats about what cats do best

icouldpeeonthis

Amazon

“I Could Pee on This: And Other Poems by Cats,” $9.89

For your friend, family member, or housemate who’s just a little too in love with their feline and could stand a reality check.

A muffler whistle, to terrorize both them and the neighborhood

mufflerwhistle

Amazon

Muffler Whistles, $8.79

To the know-it-all mechanic(s) in your life: Fix this!

Your face (or theirs) on a real potato

potatoface

Amazon

Potato Pal, $17.99

Your face on a potato. How could they not savor this forever and ever?

One dozen rattlesnake eggs (keep warm for best results)

rattlesnakeeggs

Amazon

(Fake) Rattlesnake Eggs, $7.99

Best delivered incubator-warm.

A bag of “the world’s strongest coffee”

deathwishcoffee

Amazon

Death Wish Coffee Co. Coffee, $19.99

We only hope they’ll get this is a gag.

An impossible-to-solve puzzle

ravensburgerpuzzle

Amazon

Ravensburger Puzzle, $15.68

Something to finally stump that very special whiz kid you know.

A remote-controlled scorpion (be sure to pre-open and gift-wrap this one)

rcscorpion

Amazon

Remote-Controlled Scorpion, $15.99

Have the remote handy for when they open this one; it’ll work a lot better.

A game for the whole family

relativeinsanity

Amazon

Relative Insanity Party Game, $14.16

Think “Cards Against Humanity,” but for some wholesome fun for the whole family.

A personal cleansing wheel (in lieu of the bidet they keep asking for)

rotowipe

Amazon

Roto Wipe Personal Cleansing Wheel, $7.99

So they’ll finally stop pestering you for that exorbitant bidet thing they all love so much over in Europe. (Note: This is just an empty box in which to wrap your real gift.)

Instructions for gracefully approaching (and achieving) senescence

crotchety

Amazon

“How Not to Become a Crotchety Old Man,” $6.39

Dear Dad (or Grandpa)…

Snot (and tear) mittens, for those who work outdoors, or just won’t stop wiping their nose on their sleeve

snittens

Amazon

Snittens, The Original Snot Mittens, $19.99

One side for snot, the other for tears. Maybe after receiving this, they’ll stop wiping their nose on their sleeve, or their bare hands. Probably not. Either way, they actually work!

A practice putting green for the bathroom

toiletgolf

Amazon

Toilet Golf, $9.95

If their Golf Digest subscription just isn’t cutting it on long trips to the john anymore, they can always stand to work on their short game.

 

 

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What Jeff and MacKenzie Bezos’ Divorce Could Mean for Amazon

https://www.cnn.com/2019/01/10/tech/jeff-bezos-divorce-amazon/index.html

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly