This Is the Only Real Way to Know If Your Partner Is Micro-Cheating

Is micro-cheating a real thing?

What is micro cheating? How do you define it? Is it just as bad as “normal” cheating in relationships?

Plus, how can you communicate relationship boundaries when it comes to this kind of emotional infidelity?

Micro cheating can be defined in many ways:

Cosmopolitan says that it’s the “small things you do that could have whispers of infidelity, without actually being unfaithful.”

Time magazine defines it as “a set of behaviors that flirts with the line between faithfulness and unfaithfulness.”

And Urban Dictionary says that it’s “small acts considered disloyal within a relationship. Nothing too serious, but not innocent either.”

Because there are so many definitions of micro-cheating, a whole lot of behaviors may or may not even qualify — a raised eyebrow, a furtive smile, lightly touching someone on the arm, browsing profiles on hookup apps but not actually hooking up, chatting with an ex on social media, checking out a little porn here and there, sexting, webcamming with strangers, going to a strip club with the guys (or gals), or getting a massage when away on business.

What is considered cheating? Where do we draw between micro-cheating and actually being unfaithful?

Here’s a thought: Maybe there’s no line to draw. Maybe cheating is cheating.

Maybe calling a behavior that violates one’s relationship boundaries micro-cheating is simply a way of justifying that behavior.

Or maybe there is a meaningful difference between micro-cheating and emotional cheating.

Cheating is “the breaking of trust that occurs when you keep intimate, meaningful secrets from your partner.”

Notice that this definition of infidelity does not name specific sexual or romantic behaviors.

Instead, it focuses on what matters most in romantic relationships — mutual trust.

If you’ve engaged in sexual or romantic behaviors that violate the trust in your relationship, you’ve cheated.

My definition also suggests that a list of behaviors that do and don’t qualify as cheating depends on the couple.

If you and your partner have mutually agreed that looking at porn is not an issue, so be it. And who cares what your grandmother thinks about it? This is your relationship to define, not hers.

If, however, you and your significant other have mutually agreed that porn is not OK, then plugging in that flash drive filled with your favorite videos is cheating.

Interestingly, for betrayed partners, it’s usually not the specifics of what you’ve done that causes the most pain.

What hurts the most is the lying, the manipulation, and the keeping of secrets from the cheating spouse — the lies of omission.

When you engage in sexual and romantic behaviors that violate relationship boundaries (including marriage vows), you’ve cheated. Period.

And when you lie about that behavior and keep it secret, you’re compounding the damage.

That said, maybe micro-cheating really is a thing — a less-damaging form of cheating.

My definition of micro-cheating centers not on the specifics of the “sextracurricular” act, but on how deeply that behavior and any lies and secrets surrounding that behavior impacts the betrayed partner when the behavior comes to light.

In other words, how profoundly is relationship trust affected by the act and by covering up the act?

If you find yourself now wondering what constitutes cheating (micro or full-blown) in your relationship, initiate a discussion with your partner about what behaviors are and are not acceptable.

When you both can mutually define your relationship boundaries in this way, cheating is much less likely.

Moreover, by being open and honest with one another about your sexual desires and limits, you can develop a deeper sense of emotional intimacy and relationship trust.

In short, you strengthen your intimate connection.

The more open and honest you and your partner are with each other, the more intimacy you will have. So give this conversation a go.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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5 Ways To End Drama In Your Relationship

Every human relationship has the potential for drama from time to time.

Everyone has wound up in an argument that’s spiraled out of control at one time or another. But a couple that experiences a drama-free relationship isn’t due to their innately chill nature, or not entirely at least.

Being drama-free takes a bit of practice. Here are 5 ways to end unnecessary drama in your relationship.

1. Communicate openly and freely

This is the first point on our list because it is easily the most important. If there’s anyone you should be able to communicate anything to, it’s your partner. Communicating your needs can leave you exposed and vulnerable, but the alternative is uncertainty, which carries with it the potential for even worse outcomes.

Without communication, small nuisances can fester into resentment. Resentment can lead you to do and say things that you otherwise probably wouldn’t. Things like passive-aggressive remarks, careless behavior, and talking behind your partner’s back. All of these things can lead to drama in your relationship. Open communication is one of your best defenses against drama.

2. Practice active listening

Communication is only 50% of what it takes to avoid drama in your relationship. The other half of the equation is active listening.

It is not uncommon for arguments to devolve into two people just waiting for their turn to yell. You should feel like there is space in your relationship to speak your truth, but active listening is important for anyone wanting to avoid drama in their relationship. When communicating with your partner, let them speak, listen to their words, and take into consideration what that means. And expect the same of them as well.

3. Walk a mile in their shoes

Drama inherently stems from a lack of empathy. We are at our most dramatic when we are hyper-focused on ourselves – our feelings, our needs, our wants – and not thinking at all about the other person.

Empathy is the ability to feel and understand another person’s feelings and experiences. It’s what causes you to feel creeped out when you see a spider crawling up someone else’s arm. The spider isn’t on your arm, but you know how it would make you feel, and that’s what gives you the creeped out feeling.

But empathy is something that we can block out or not take into consideration, which is dangerous when you’re in a relationship. Before you do something or say something that you know could cause drama in your relationship, stop and think: how would this feel if my partner did this to me?

4. Don’t vent to mutual friends

I could probably break down each dramatic behavior one by one and talk about why you shouldn’t do them, but probably the most important thing to avoid is venting to mutual friends about your relationship. It doesn’t matter if you were friends with them first, if you share a friendship with another person, they need to be off the table when discussing problems in your relationship with others. To vent to a mutual friend is equivalent to talking behind your partner’s back.

It can be a good thing to have a trusted confidant when talking about relationship issues. But communicating with your partner is the most important kind of communication. So before you vent to others, ask yourself: should I just communicate my feelings to my partner? Doing so will likely yield more favorable results.

5. Leave a relationship with grace

Relationships can be dynamic and changing. A person you are friends with today could be your lover someday, and a lover today could be your best friend tomorrow. If the decision has been made to end a romantic relationship in favor of a platonic relationship, leave that relationship with dignity and grace. Even if you’re on your way out, consider the things we’ve discussed so far in this article.

Communicate freely with your partner, even if they’re no longer your lover, be an active listener, empathize with them, and don’t vent to mutual friends.

 

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10 Ways to Shake Things up in Your Relationship

Monotony is defined as the lack of variety and interest. Sooner or later, there comes a point in our lives where life becomes routine. It feels like there’s no fun or excitement left. Whenever someone asks you what’s new, the answer is always, “Routine: same old, same old.” Sometimes, when you wake up in the morning, you feel as if there’s nothing to look forward to. You know exactly how your day is going to pan out from the time you wake up to the time you go to bed.

That’s when you know you’re stuck in a monotonous rut.

There is nothing wrong with having a predictable, disciplined, and stable life. However, sometimes you need to get out of your comfort zone and do something to keep the spark alive. We get so involved in our lives and comfort zones that we don’t make time for any adventures. Remember, adventure may hurt you, but monotony will kill you. The worst type of monotony we can experience occurs in our personal relationships, especially romantic ones. It’s often hard to break away from it, but there are options to try.

Here are 10 ways to shake things up in your relationship to break from the everyday monotony.

1. Communicate

It doesn’t always happen that both parties in the relationship feel the monotony. One person may be very involved in their own routine to even realize how the other person is feeling. Therefore, it is crucial to let the other party know how you’re feeling about the stagnancy in order to work towards making it better.

2. Take Time Out For Each Other

If the monotony has set in, it is important to set time aside for one another. You can spend that time at home or go out, whatever floats your boat. It is essential to break away from the routine and spend time with your significant other without any distractions.

3. Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

We get so tied up in our everyday life that we can’t imagine what it would be like to get out of our comfort zones to do something. Take up an adventure or something you normally wouldn’t do, get that adrenaline rush that will help bind your relationship together and leave you wanting more.

4. Try A New Activity Together

The world is full of choices. In fact, one is spoilt for choice. Rather than being in the normal work-home rut, try a new activity that your partner and you both enjoy. It could be a new sport, a class, or a hobby. Whatever it is, it will help you look forward to your time with each other.

5. Take A Trip Together

I cannot emphasize how important it is to travel as a couple. From the planning to execution, it will only bring you closer, and more importantly, it will help in getting to know each others’ likes and dislikes a lot better.

6. Surprise Each Other

It is such a wonderful feeling to get a surprise from another person. It doesn’t have to be some grand gesture, but just the thought counts. Rather than always agreeing to what your partner wants or saying “whatever you want” to everything, plan something from start to finish and surprise them. This will bring back the lost spark in your relationship.

7. Spend Time Apart

A happy and successful relationship doesn’t involve two people being joint at the hip. In fact, it’s just the opposite. Having your own set of things to do and then coming back to your partner will help you feel more fulfilled in your relationship. Being in a relationship shouldn’t involve a person losing their identity to become one. In fact, two people need to maintain their separate identities and realize how much they miss each other while spending time apart.

8. Discuss Old Memories

As time goes on, two people who are in a long-term relationship may end up having very few things to talk about. Silence can be troubling to some people and if you are one of them, the best way to talk about new things is by reminiscing about old memories. Sure there must be a lot you would’ve experienced together and talking about it will only bring you closer.

9. Make Deliberate Changes

No two people are perfect and, there have to be things and habits you don’t like about your partner and vice versa. Rather than letting it be as it is, it is a very thoughtful gesture to try and work deliberately towards correcting them. It will make your partner know how much you love and appreciate them.

10. Research

The moment you realize you’re getting stuck in any kind of routine, research things that your partner and you will enjoy together. Try something new every week. It doesn’t need to be something big, just some small thing or activity that will keep you on your toes. It will help you look forward to something and keep things moving.

When monotony strikes in, life becomes complacent. We lose the drive and want to do things differently. We get so stuck in our ways and routine that it becomes hard to break free. However, if we don’t make a change, our relationship will suffer. We will be resentful towards our partner and our relationship for becoming the way it is.

The sooner you can address this issue, the better it will be in the long run. See what works for you. Each person is different, and different things can help break life’s monotony. It’s not fair to let the relationship suffer just become you don’t want to put time and effort to make both your lives better. Remember, it is crucial to prevent a relationship from getting boring.

Put as much effort into keeping your significant other as you did to get them.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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How to Have a Casual Relationship Without Getting Hurt or Betrayed

If you’re wondering how to have a casual relationship without getting hurt, it’s not easy. Be sure of your decision, and approach with caution.

I don’t want you getting hurt needlessly in a casual relationship gone bad. And the hurt occurs whatever side of the coin you’re on! Follow these 12 not-so-easy ways for how to have a casual relationship without getting hurt.

Sometimes a person is placed in your path who you want to be with badly. This feeling might push you to do something you would advise someone else not to do. For example, embarking on a casual relationship that has no chance of going anywhere, simply for the pay off of getting to spend time with that person.

You might tell yourself that they’ll change their mind. They’ll want to be with you once they get to know you properly.

This is a common situation. In fact, most people have been in it at some point. I know I have. The thing is, casual relationships take a certain amount of strength and emotional control, otherwise you risk of getting hurt.

The best of intentions can still land you with hurt

Okay, I’ll admit, sometimes someone tells you they want a casual relationship because they have no clue what they really want. After spending a certain amount of time in this casual relationship, they develop feelings and want a real relationship.

I’m not going to lie and say that it doesn’t happen. It does. The problem is, holding out for this possibility is a risk.

Most people who say they want a casual relationship say this because that’s exactly what they want—no commitment. Entering into this type of relationship with the hope that it will become more risks wasting precious time that you could be spending with someone who wants the same things as you.

Lecture over. If you’re sure that you want to go into this casual relationship, do so with your eyes open. Maybe you don’t know what you want right now. You think a casual relationship might be just what you need to give your life a spot of excitement while you figure things out. If that’s the case, and you’re sure, go for it.

How to have a casual relationship without getting hurt… hopefully

Before I delve into this, I want to state here and now that following these steps doesn’t mean you’re going to avoid any type of emotional distress. Casual relationships are hard if you develop feelings. That’s my disclaimer, now let’s explore a little more.

#1 Understand what you’re getting into from the start. Know your starting point in order to be able to handle this type of arrangement. That’s what it is, an arrangement that means you spend time with someone, with no promise of an emotional attachment. Give yourself a good talking to and be firm in your knowledge that this is not the start of a big love affair.

#2 Know yourself—can you handle this without developing feelings? If you’re someone who easily gets attached after sex or develops feelings quickly, this type of arrangement will end in tears. Rule number one for now to have a casual relationship without getting hurt is know yourself. If you’re sure you can handle it and feelings won’t come into the equation, go for it. If you’re not sure, approach with severe caution.

#3 Have a serious conversationNobody wants to have a serious sit down conversation with someone about where something might lead. But, if you want to be sure of what you’re actually going to be getting into, know the facts. Ask this person what they want. Do they want a relationship in the future? Do they want to be single but have perks, e.g. friend with benefits?

Make sure they’re being open and honest with you. Then do the same with them. Knowing the facts will be the basis of your journey into how to have a casual relationship without getting hurt in the end.

#4 Ask yourself if you could handle seeing them with someone else? If you were out walking and you bumped into them with another person, how would you feel? Would it knock the air out of your lungs?

If you do see this, they’re not doing anything wrong because they haven’t made an exclusive commitment to you. Casual means exactly that no strings.

#5 Don’t allow them to become your worldDon’t cancel plans with your friends or family to see this person. If you start doing that, you make them an important part of your life. Feelings are developing or aren’t far behind. Casual means that you see them when you have nothing else to do, it doesn’t mean you make firm plans and cancel your life for them. The chances are they’re not going to be doing this for you either.

#6 Don’t mix your circle of friendsNever introduce this person to your regular circle of friends, and make sure that you keep it all separate. If you start mixing your groups, things will get muddy and difficult when things eventually end. And they will at some point. By having a separate outlet, i.e. your social group, you avoid them becoming too important in your life.

#7 Always practice safe sexOf course, it goes without saying that any sex you have with this person should be ultra-safe. STIs and pregnancy aren’t things that go well in casual relationships. These things tend to be life changing and that’s not the point of an arrangement such as this.

Put your health and your future first. Keep everything safe and protected.

#8 Don’t think about milestonesIf you start to think “oh, it’s three months since we met,” you’re entering rocky ground. Avoid typical relationship milestones and don’t allow them to enter your mind. Save these types of milestones for relationships that have a future, unions that mean something to you in the future.

It might sound cold, and it could be that you have a friendships with this person you’re being all casual with, but if you want to save your heart, be a little aloof and distant.

#9 Do not give it a labelThis isn’t a relationship, so don’t call it one. I’m referring to it as a ‘casual relationship’ but I don’t mean it in the traditional sense. You’re not together, you’re not one half of a union. You’re not in a situation which has a ‘let’s see what happens.’ No, you’ve chosen to be in an arrangement that is super-casual. That’s all it is.

#10 Keep everything as light as possibleIt’s not the best idea to talk to your casual buddy about emotional things or anything heavy going on in your life. If you do, you enter emotional territory which signals danger for your heart. Keep everything light and fun, and if you can do that, this arrangement might turn out to be a welcome distraction from the heavier things in life.

#11 Limit your meetings to a minimum. What your minimum is depends on you. It’s a good idea to limit how much you see this person, to avoid the feelings creep. A couple of times a week is certainly enough, but less if you can manage it.

Generally speaking, the more time you spend with someone, the more likely you develop an attachment on an emotional level. That’s not how to have a casual relationship without getting hurt!

#12 Know your limits and walk away if you start to feel. Be honest with yourself and know when it’s time to walk away. Most casual relationships are great for a time. Then they run out of steam naturally, or someone walks away because they develop feelings. It’s rare that a casual relationship becomes a great love affair. Not impossible, but a huge risk to hold onto that idea.

If you start to feel the bubble of emotion, do yourself a favor and quit while ahead.

Understanding how to have a casual relationship without getting hurt really comes down to knowing yourself and your limits. Be honest, open, and don’t hope for more than promised.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

You can check out my books here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

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You & Your Partner’s Body Language When You’re Sitting Can Speak Volumes

Whether you’re on a dinner date, side-by-side at a basketball game, or on the couch before Netflix and chill (or Disney+ and thrust), you and your partner’s body language when you’re sitting can speak volumes about your closeness. I spoke with body language expert Traci Brown about what you can gather from the way you and bae position your bodies in relation to each other, from the direction of their legs and feet, to how they use their hands.

In terms of overall body language, Brown says you shouldn’t base your sole understanding of how your partner feels about you on each individual body language cue. “You’re going to want to see more than one thing at once to get a good ‘read’ of what’s going on. Because if you just look at one movement by itself, you’re not going to get the picture of what’s really going on,” Brown tells us. Additionally, it’s important to remember that body language can only tell you so much about how someone really feels. The best way to understand your partner is to ask them any questions you might have directly, and remain in consistent communication about your feelings.

Here’s what body language experts had to say about what your partner’s sitting posture can mean for your relationship dynamic.

First, Look At The Distance Between You & Your Partner’s Bodies

“You want to look for how physically close they are to you,” Brown tells us. If you and your partner are sitting super close together and your bodies are touching, that’s a good sign you two are emotionally intimate.

But if your partner (or your date!) is on the other side of the couch, take note. Blanca Cobb, body language expert, previously told us that someone who’s not romantically interested in you will probably keep their distance. She said that if they “pull back, or turn their shoulders away from you when you get close to each other,” you might want to ask them what’s up.

Take Note Of Their Legs & Feet

Kevin Mazur/WireImage/Getty Images

Have you ever noticed the way people sit in chairs or on couches? Maybe they have both feet planted firmly on the ground, or one foot on the ground and the other curled under their leg. Brown acknowledges there’s an “element of habit” in how people sit and with body language across the board, but when your legs are crossed toward someone, “you’re generally more into them,” Brown says. “You can also look at their feet. Are their feet pointed toward you?” If so, that’s a good sign. Body language expert Patti Wood also agrees that feet pointing toward you bodes well for attraction.

“[It’s] a limbic brain response  where the feet point, the heart follows,” Wood previously told us.

Don’t Ignore Their Arms & Hands

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Brown recommends taking note of how your partner touches you when you’re sitting next to each other. For example, bae leaning forward with a hand over yours, or their hand on your arm are both signs they’re feeling passionate. “If you see those together, it’s a pretty good sign that they’re into you,” Brown says.

On the other end of the spectrum, take note of any body language cue signaling your partner is bored. Brown gives an example of a couple she saw out on a date. One person was talking incessantly, while the other had their elbow on the table and their chin on their hand. “Things like that can be really telling as well,” she says. “Boredom is not a win.” Wood also told us that apart from turning away or slumping on the table, “lazily resting their arm around the back of the chair” might indicate your partner has checked out of your interaction together.

Brown reiterates that studying your partner’s body language, while helpful, shouldn’t be the only way you gauge how they’re feeling. “With body language, you’re getting a snapshot of an instant. The question is: Can you piece them all together to get a potential list of what could be on their mind?” she asks. “Body language can tell you you what’s on someone’s mind, but it doesn’t tell you why.” Ultimately if the dynamic between you and your partner feels off, don’t be afraid to face the tough conversation and ask them what’s up.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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If You Get Bored Easily In Relationships, Experts Say These 7 Reasons May Be Why

Feeling bored at some point in your relationship is normal. Once the honeymoon period ends, you’ll enter into the comfortable stage. While it may not be as exciting and new as it once was, you and your partner have the opportunity to deepen your bond and solidify your commitment to each other. But boredom in a relationship can be a problem if it happens to you all the time. According to experts, if you constantly find yourself getting bored easily in relationships, there may be something deeper going on.

“Getting bored in one relationship might be a sign that your partner isn’t a good match for you,” Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT, certified Gottman couples therapist and clinical director of A Better Life Therapy, tells Bustle. “However, having a pattern of getting bored in relationships over and over again may be a sign that you have an insecure attachment style.”

Your attachment style is developed in childhood and is based on how your parents or primary caregiver interacted with you. If your parents were emotionally unavailable or were inconsistent with their affection, you may have developed an insecure attachment style. According to Earnshaw, you’ll likely feel avoidant and withdrawn when you sense strong feelings of intimacy.

“While pop culture likes to call these people commitment-phobes, in reality most people that struggle to commit and feel bored in relationships are actually just struggling with feeling safe and secure in a relationship,” she says. “They often find that once they begin to feel intimately close to someone, they start to be hyper aware of flaws like boredom.”

Here are some other reasons behind why you easily get bored in relationships, according to experts.

1. You’re Used To More Dramatic Relationships

Young lesbian woman gets mad and jealous of her girlfriend, partner using a smartphone and not paying attention to her. The woman is in a bad mood because friend spends too much time in social media

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“People with a more anxious or activated attachment style might be uncomfortable in ‘safe’ relationships that provide security because they’re used to chaos,” Earnshaw says. Instead of looking at a peaceful relationship as something that’s good and healthy, you’re more likely to think of it as a relationship that’s become stale or boring. According to Earnshaw, this can lead you to feeling trapped and you may even convince yourself that this is something you need to escape. “If this is a disruptive pattern in your life, learning to identify your attachment style and working towards getting comfortable with what it means to be securely attached in relationships is the way forward,” she says.

2. You’re Not Allowing Yourself To Be Vulnerable Enough

Relationships are meant to grow over time. As Dave Wolovsky, relationship expert and positive psychology coach, tells Bustle, “They grow when both partners become more vulnerable with each other.” When you’re able to be open and vulnerable, you’ll gain a greater sense of intimacy and connection with your partner. Your relationship will evolve as your bond depeens over time. But when you’re closing yourself off to that kind of connection, Wolovsky says you’re not only limiting yourself, but the growth of your relationship as well. “This eventually causes a stagnation of their own personal growth and that of the relationship, which makes it boring,” he says. Opening up takes time. But if you trust that your partner won’t hurt or judge you, revealing more of your inner thoughts and feelings here and there can be helpful. It’s OK to start slow.

3. Your Communication Skills May Need Some Work

Man and woman sitting on sofa in quarrel, not talking to each other. Concept of relationship problems

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Good communication is an essential part of any relationship. Learning good communication skills takes time. As Bobbi Palmer, relationship coach and founder of Date Like a Grownup, tells Bustle, “A person who is trying to make a relationship work for the long-term will be open to and encourage discussion that helps them learn about their partner’s background, wants and needs, and dreams for the future. The ability to share these types of things is what helps a healthy relationship grow.” A part of being good at communication is being a good listener. If you don’t practice active listening in order to really understand your partner, it’s hard to move your relationship past the superficial. When you aren’t connecting with your partner in a deeper way, it can make them and your relationship seem boring.

4. You Have Unrealistic Expectations For What A Relationship Should Be

For the most part, relationships are great at the beginning. But maintaining a good relationship long-term takes work. If you’re looking for that perfect partner to sweep you off your feet and make all your romance dreams come true, you’re just setting yourself up for disappointment. “This isn’t real life,” Palmer says. “They’re bound to get bored quite quickly and move on.” When you’re seeking that perfect relationship, you’re likely to develop a pattern of jumping into a relationship and losing interest once it’s not exactly how you wanted. “The reality is that a healthy, grown up, mutually satisfying relationship requires equal give and take,” Palmer says. “Both partners show up with realistic expectations of one another, and of themselves.”

5. You’re Not That Into Your Partner

Bored unhappy girlfriend listening to African American boyfriend in cafe, bad first impression and date concept, multiracial couple having sitting at table, talking, having problem in relationships

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If you find that you get bored in relationships quickly, you may want to look at the types of people you’re choosing to date. “Bored is relative to interest,” Paul Bashea Williams, LCSW-C LICSW, relationship specialist and owner of Hearts In Mind Counseling, tells Bustle. “If you really want to keep the relationship going, you’ll explore new things with the same person as opposed to exploring new things with a new person.” You want to explore why you’re getting bored in relationships. One way to figure this out is to write down what you liked about your previous relationships and what you didn’t like. Take time to really dive into each of your past partners and your feelings about them. If you notice that they have similar traits, you may want to consider dating outside of your usual type.

6. You Think You Know Everything There Is To Know About Your Partner

“It’s too easy to imagine after a while that your partner has no more surprises to offer,” Tom Ella, dating expert and one of the hosts of The Undesirables dating podcast, tells Bustle. “You’ve heard all their stories before, you know all their favorite moves, and ultimately there’s just nothing to look forward to anymore. But that’s simply untrue.” People change all the time, and it doesn’t have to be anything drastic either. For instance, they can have new interests or opinions about what’s going on in the news. There’s always something new to discover about your partner no matter how long you’ve been together. “You need to reshape how you view partner,” Ella says. “You need to see them as a person again, not ‘just’ your partner you’ve seen a thousand times.” If you’re not open to learning more about people, you’re going to be bored every time you get into a relationship.

7. You’re Not Ready To Be In Anything Too Serious

Pensive woman thinking of something while looking at her boyfriend who is sleeping on the bed.

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If you really aren’t ready to make a commitment to someone, you may start to check out once things start getting serious. “The slightest conflict, being asked to do something that isn’t what they want to do, or just talk of a long-term commitment can send them fleeing,” Palmer says. When you’re serious about wanting to be in a relationship, you won’t get scared about the work that you’ll have to put in. You’ll likely put in the effort to get creative to find ways to keep yourself from feeling bored.

Again, boredom in a relationship is normal. But it shouldn’t be something that happens all the time and in evey relationship you’re in. If it is, the first step is to figure out why this happens. Is is attachment issues or the partners you’re choosing? Once you figure out your reason, you can make adjustments. Don’t let boredom prevent you from having a healthy and happy relationship.

 

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6 Ways To Tell That The Guy You’re Dating Isn’t Going To Last

Relationships have existed since cavemen used their clubs to knock women out, drag them to a cave, and claim, “You mine!” Thankfully, so much has changed since then. Yet for some reason, we still let men hold all the power in relationships, just like we did in prehistoric times. We know we shouldn’t give all our power to a guy, but there are plenty of toxic guys out there who aren’t worth our time.

Why would you let a guy call all the shots? Maybe you allow it because you really love him. Maybe you lack the confidence that you need to take charge. Or maybe you just think that there’s no one better out there.

Regardless, spending all of your energy on the wrong guy ends up wasting precious time that you could spend on literally anyone else. Sometimes we become so wrapped up in our feelings that we don’t even realize that our love is unrequited.

So how do you know whether or not the guy you are investing your energy into is worth your time? Here are six glaring red flags that’ll prove that the guy you’re investing your energy into isn’t worth your time:

1. You’re the one putting all the effort into communicating.

In a balanced, healthy relationship, both partners will make an effort to keep the lines of communication open. It’s be glaringly obvious if you’re the one always initiating conversations, especially if you scroll through your messages.

If you’re unsure how a guy feels about you, take a step back for a few days and see what happens. This is your opportunity to find clarity. Does your phone stay silent? If so, he’s not worth your time because he’s not making any effort to communicate with you.

2. You don’t meet important people in his life.

You’ve been dating for a while, but your outings are always just you and your partner, or on occasion, some of your friends. You have never met his friends or family, and he blows off any conversation about them. If your significant other engages in this behavior, watch out, because he may be pocketing you. If you’re being pocketed, get out of the relationship now. Don’t let a guy string you along and then crush you. Men like that are not worth crying over.

3. He’s keeping your relationship secret.

You want to shout your love to the world, but your guy wants to keep things low-key. You have all your dates in relatively obscure places where no one will see you. Even if he claims that he wants to keep you to himself or save money, these secret rendezvous may be a warning sign that he’s hiding you away. If you feel suspicious that he’s hiding something by hiding you, don’t give into his requests for secret dates. You deserve better!

4. You do all of the digging.

When you’re interested in someone, you typically enjoy learning all about them. However, if you’re all of your conversations with your partner feel like a one-sided interview because they don’t bother asking you anything, then they’re probably not worth your energy in the long term.

5. You’re not his priority.

Maybe you’re dying to see a new movie, but he won’t give you a clear “yes” when you ask him to go. Or perhaps he often bails on you at the last minute and gives you a bunch of lame excuses. Maybe you’re the only one who ever initiates plans because he can’t be bothered to spend time with you. If you don’t feel like his priority now, chances are that you never will.

6. He avoids talking about your relationship’s future.

You don’t have to leave bridal magazines lying around your living room to find out your partner’s stance on marriage. But if you’ve invested a good chunk of time into your relationship with someone, you should have a deep discussion about he sees himself in the future and if that future includes you. If he avoids your efforts to casually discuss long-term goals and aspirations, chances are good that he doesn’t see you as a permanent fixture in his life. If that’s the case, get out before you invest any more of your time in him.

Are you fishing where the bottom-feeders hide or where you find the real catches? If your man is flashing neon warning signs and you are ignoring them, your relationship is not going to end well, so don’t be afraid to get out now. You don’t need to club a man over the head to get him to love you. You’re worth so much more than a man who won’t invest his time in you, so if he’s not worth your time, spend it on you and your friends instead.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

My new book, Angel with a Broken Wing is now for sale on Amazon!

 

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Avoid This Guy! 14 Warning Signs That He’s Not What You Want

A guy who’s not relationship material always lets you know; you just have to know what to look for.

When I look back at all the relationships that didn’t work out (that I so wanted to at the time), I realize that in every case, there were early warning signs that each guy gave me that could have given me some idea of the heartbreak I was about to experience if I had only been aware of what to look for.

To spare you from being played for a fool by a man, here’s the inside scoop on what you can be on the lookout for so you can break up with him before he breaks your heart..

Here’s the ultimate list of warning signs that clearly tell you that he’s a guy to avoid if you’re looking for a real relationship.

1.  He doesn’t call you when he says he’s going to.

Granted, I know that sometimes life can get it the way, and if he’s working late on that big project with the looming deadline it’s possible that time might get away from him once in a while. But if this happens more than once or twice, it’s a sure sign that you’re just not a priority for him right now.

If a guy is really interested in starting (or continuing) a real relationship with you, you will be on his mind, and he won’t forget to call.

2.  He’s often late and doesn’t call to let you know.

I know there are lots of reasons people can run late that are beyond their control (traffic jam, car problems, being stuck at the office), but a quick call from his cell phone will put your mind at ease, and let you know that you have a few more minutes to try on that one other outfit you were still considering.

The point here is about being respectful of your time – we can forgive lateness, even chronic lateness (some people just aren’t good at judging how much time something will take), but not calling to let you know he’ll be a little late?

That’s inexcusable and a sure sign that he’s not too concerned about you.

3.  He doesn’t show up at all (and doesn’t call) when you have plans to see him.

OK ladies, unless he was (verifiably) unconscious in a hospital somewhere, getting stood up is a “one strike and you’re out” offense. There is absolutely no good reason for this (except the one above), and if you stay with him after a maneuver like that, you’ll be in for a very bumpy emotional ride that’s almost guaranteed to end badly.

Cell phone reception is excellent these days (unless he’s a lumberjack working in the great North Woods), so this one is unforgivable.

4.  He has rules about how often he can see you.
It’s one thing to have the boys’ “Wednesday Poker Night”, or something along those lines.

But if he’s only willing to get together say, every other weekend (with the exception being a child custody situation), then that’s a sure sign he’s keeping his options open and still scouring the market for something better (at least in his mind – he just doesn’t realize that you’re the best thing going!).

5.  He knows way more about you than you know about him.

If you find yourself doing all the talking during your conversations, and when you ask him something about himself he doesn’t say much, it may be because he’s hiding something or doesn’t want to get too close to you.

Many guys just aren’t big talkers, but if he hasn’t told you the details of where he works, where he grew up, went to school, etc., and if he gives you vague answers when you ask him about these specifics, then that means he’s keeping you at a distance.

6.  You know way more about him than he knows about you.

This one is the flip side to the last warning sign – if he’s so busy talking all about himself, and shows no interest in who you are, what you like to do, or what your idea of the future looks like, this should be a real red flag.

The good news about this one is that there’s no danger of taking it personally – it’s all about him. It has nothing to do with you – this kind of guy isn’t interested in anyone – but himself. Steer clear (way clear).

7.  He doesn’t tell anyone about you. 

If he doesn’t introduce you to his friends, or ask you to hang out with them once in a while, go to a party or get together with them – that’s a sure sign that he’s not sure about the whole thing. Of course you may not want to hang out with his friends much, particularly if they’re a group of partying bachelors, but they should at least know about you, and it should be your decision.

How they treat you when you’re around can also be a big tell-tale sign of how things are going or will go – if they kind of treat you like “yeah, you’re the girlfriend of the month, I’ll talk to you if you can make it past week 4”, then that’s a sign of what’s likely to be coming next.

8.  He doesn’t invite you to meet his family – ever.
Of course inviting you to meet the family is a big deal, as it should be, and it doesn’t happen until he feels like this thing is going somewhere. So that’s just it – if time is starting to drag on, and he still hasn’t invited you to meet his family, the likelihood is that he’s having doubts about the relationship. There is the outside chance that he’s embarrassed by his family. I have a good friend whose husband’s family (which consists of his elderly mother and Aunt, who raised him together and still both live together) are essentially, well, mildly deranged.

They look like the stereotypical “bag ladies”, and even showed up for my friends nuptials wearing multiple layers of ragged clothing and carrying some of their belongings in what were essentially re-useable shopping bags. But he had told her about them fairly early on in their relationship, and she did finally meet them. And let me say, as far as mildly deranged people go, they’re very sweet (I met them at the wedding), and they did a great job at raising their son/nephew.

So, the bottom line is that if the relationship has been going on for some time – just to put a number on it, let’s say over 6 months – and he hasn’t invited you to meet his family yet, it’s certainly time to question him about it. If he still doesn’t introduce you? Time to start planning your exit strategy.

9.  He doesn’t spend the holidays with you.

I know there are situations, such as when a divorced man wants to spend time with his children at the family holiday get together, but even then he can make time for you either before or after his family time. Everyone knows how special holidays are to us women, and if he doesn’t, then that’s a sign of other issues (for example, not being considerate and thoughtful regarding your feelings).

If he’s just taking off on a surf vacation to Bali with his buddies over the holidays because that’s when it’s less crowded, and you’re not invited, then you’re clearly a low priority to him.

10.  He’s got lots of female friends – and makes sure you know this.
In my experience, “platonic” friendships are rarely, if ever, that – there are almost always some feelings in one direction.

Either the guy is secretly harboring feelings for the girl, or vice versa. And when a guy is in a relationship, he has so much less time to spend with his buddies – why on earth would he ever choose to spend that precious time with another woman? Well, there are a number of reasons he might, and they all involve one deep seated issue or another, and none of them are good.

And making sure you know about it? That’s just playing games, and just another reason to get out and find yourself an emotionally healthy man to be in a relationship with.

11.  He doesn’t tell you what he’s doing, where he’s going, or when he’ll be back.

If your guy likes to keep you guessing, there’s a reason. This is another sure sign that he’s keeping his options open. In a healthy relationship there’s no hiding or secrets. If he’s not being open and upfront about his whereabouts, then stop worrying about it – just move on.

12.  He doesn’t talk about his plans for the future with you.
I’m all for living in the moment and enjoying the “now”. But eventually in a relationship a discussion of future plans has got to come up – otherwise you’ll never know if the two of you are sailing together or heading towards different continents.

If he’s not at least occasionally talking about the future with you then chances are, in his mind, you’re not in it.

13.  He lets you know he had a life without you and he still has a life without you.

I mean, sure, when you’re first dating, it’s interesting to hear about the places your guy has been and all of the fun times he’s had with his friends.

But if he’s still reminiscing about his single life escapades after your relationship has moved to the next level, or worse, making plans to have more of those escapades (without you), then the truth is he still wants to be single. Let him.

14.  You feel like if you could just change yourself and not be so needy, this would all work out.
This is by far the biggest warning sign of all. If you start to feel that there’s something wrong with you, or you’re doing something wrong that’s causing him to pull away, and maybe if you just gave him more of the freedom he wants, and wait for him quietly, and…well, you get it.

Don’t fall into this trap. If you want a real relationship, equipped with real feelings, real caring, real consideration, and real romance, and he doesn’t, then he’s not the right guy for you and let him (and yourself) go.

If you see any of these warning signs, and especially if you see several of them, chances are that this is not a guy that’s looking for a real relationship right now – or at least not the kind you’re looking for.

Your best bet is to walk away gracefully, with your self-esteem intact, and not look back (even if he then starts calling you and chasing you – that’s just a sign of a game-player with deeper issues). Rather than trying to get him to change or waiting for him to come around, try focusing on you and why you’re in a relationship with someone like this.

If you find yourself in this type of relationship often, which many of us do, it’s time for some real soul searching to get to the root of it.

If you have access to good counseling, take advantage of it, as many times this is the only way to true healing. And it will be worth it in the long run, to get you past the cycle of toxic relationships so you can move on to the kind of true, sustainable love that you want to attract into your life.

Sometimes it’s hard to see when we’re in it, but know that if you’re settling for less than you deserve, there truly is someone out there ready and waiting to give you what you’re looking for – and to treat you the way you deserve to be treated.

It’s in believing in ourselves, trusting our gut instincts and discovering who we really are and what we’re really looking for, that all the other pieces of the puzzle fall into place and we find ourselves finally getting it right and discovering the love of our lives – the one who doesn’t come with any red flags.

And you deserve nothing less than that, no matter where you’ve been or what you’ve been through.

It’s all out there waiting for you!

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy my new book, Angel with a Broken Wing is now for sale on Amazon!

 

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7 Relationship Red Flags You Should Never Ignore

“I’ve met enough Red Flags I could paper my walls with them…”

Keep an eye out. 

Dating can feel like an endless game.

Whether you spot each other across a crowded bar or take a chance and swipe right, we all begin by flying blind into the unknown. At first, it’s a game of first impressions. You take an inventory of their outfit, make a note of their drink order and use every piece of information to paint a picture of who they are.

After a couple of dates, the walls start to crumble and we begin to really learn about our new crush. Dubbed the ‘honeymoon phase’, these early weeks of dating are all about testing the waters and seeing if you both are truly compatible. Exhausting, right!

Once you’ve landed yourself a new partner, the real work begins. It means getting creative with date night, actively listening to your other half and maintaining a thriving network of besties and friends to keep your social life balanced. But, what if things don’t feel quite right? If you’re unsure about your new relationship, read on to discover the seven relationship red flags you should never sweep under the rug.

1. Lack of communication

After a hard day at work, we all need to let off some steam. And sharing our concerns with our partner is a healthy way of processing stress and building connections. When it comes to communication, we all want to share our thoughts without reservation.

If your partner seems absent, dismissive or unresponsive, this is an important red flag to take notice of. Lack of communication can mean important conversations go unspoken. When we aren’t able to speak openly and honestly about how we feel, we can feel ignored and, ultimately, resentful of the other person. In fact, these small annoyances can grow and spell disaster for your relationships in the long term.

2. Dislike for your friends or family

This next red flag can be very subtle, but it’s an important one to be aware of. How does your partner speak about your loved ones? Do they resent coming along to family get togethers? Maybe they don’t take the time to get to know your besties? Or perhaps they avoid socializing with your friends and family all together?

If you feel a disconnect between your partner and your social network, it can be difficult to sustain a healthy romantic relationship. Why? Because sharing time with our friends, family and partner shouldn’t happen in isolation. In some cases, this can also be an early warning sign of controlling behaviour. If you notice your partner withdrawing from your network, start a conversation to understand their reservations and what you can both do to address them.

3. Innocently pushing physical boundaries

Respect is the foundation of every successful relationship. When we feel valued by our partners, we’re able to build stronger and more meaningful connections. However, when the opposite is true, this can spell disaster for our relationship.

How does your partner react when you tell them to stop tickling you? Do they invade your personal space or jokingly poke you like a sibling, even when you’ve told them no? Respect begins at acknowledging and honoring each other’s boundaries. If you notice your partner doesn’t listen to your requests, this could be an essential red flag to watch out for.

4. Describing their exes as ‘crazy’

We’ve all had terrible partners and relationships that were destined to fail. It could have been your first high school fling or that crush you had when you started uni. Whatever the case, we all encounter people that just aren’t the right fit for us.

However, if you notice your new partner speaking badly about their past relationships this is something to take notice of. When terms like ‘crazy’ start to be attributed to multiple previous partners, it could be time to consider whether your partner is representing their dating past accurately. In many cases, they could lack the self-awareness to realize they were, in fact, part of the problem.

5. Refusing to make your relationship public 

PDA (or public displays of affection) can be a divisive topic. For some, walking hand in hand comes as second nature. For others, they avoid displays of physical intimacy at all costs. Whatever camp your relationship falls into, it’s a wise idea to consider what is motivating this decision.

Do you notice your partner’s behaviour change when you’re around his mates? Does his social media presence appear as if you’re not together? Has he avoided ‘putting a label’ on your relationship? If your partner is keen to keep things a secret, this could be a warning sign that your relationship might not be as open and honest as it first seems.

6. Difference in values 

We all have our own unique priorities. The stuff that matters most to us. It could be things like honesty or compassion, or more specific values like savings habits and big-picture parenting goals. Although we might not always see eye to eye, sharing core values are key to long term relationship success.

Does your partner play off dishonesty as ‘little white lies’? Do they make decisions without factoring in your plans or point of view? What is their relationship like with their parents and siblings? If you are noticing clear patterns of conflicting values, this could be a good indication that you might struggle to remain compatible over time.

7. Incapable of apologizing 

Arrogant, entitled and patronizing behavior should never be ignored. However, when we’re falling hard for a new fling it can be difficult to see situations clearly. But, learning how to identify negative behaviors early in a relationship can prevent you from getting stuck in a toxic dynamic.

If your partner constantly refuses to apologize or admit they’ve messed up, it’s important not to ignore this. Although this might seem like an insignificant personality trait, it can indicate your partner may have an inflated sense of self-importance. Because let’s be honest, no one wants to date someone who can’t say sorry.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy my new book, Angel with a Broken Wing on Amazon!

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Why Modern Dating Sucks

Introduction

Why does dating nowadays suck so much? If you’ve ever had this question or wondered how your parents managed to meet someone they liked enough to marry, you’re not alone. If the end of your twenties is approaching, or has come and gone, and you’re still single, congratulations! You are, in all likelihood, a hopeless romantic who is more than deserving of the relationship you crave. I write this in hopes of helping you understand why your dating life so far has completely sucked. Maybe understanding will help you turn the tide and meet the love of your life! If so, don’t forget to invite me to the wedding.

If you are someone who found your husband or wife on Tinder or Plenty of Fish, this article is not for you (but I’m happy for you). I realize there are always exceptions, and nothing is black or white, but I only have my perspective. To be fair, an instance of organically meeting someone is included in this consideration. It doesn’t seem to matter how the meeting occurred – the behavior and character of relationship was essentially the same in my experience. It completely sucked! Read on to find out why.

The charming days of your beau calling your landline phone and having to speak to your mother first are long gone.
The charming days of your beau calling your landline phone and having to speak to your mother first are long gone. | Source

Real and Meaningful Communication Has Become a Rarity

I love technology and the ability to e-mail and text. I prefer texting to talking aloud. I have always been a quiet but expressive person, and despite my soft-spoken nature, I still like to communicate in ways that resonate with me. I am not much of a talker, but I have always been a writer. It is primarily through my writing voice that I touch other souls and let them know what’s happening inside my head.

I see ads for Tinder or other dating apps where two people communicate purely by emojis, and it disgusts me. After my mom passed away, as I was going through her house, I found a Sephora box full of love letters in my room that I had kept from guys I dated during my school years. It was sad when I realized that my boyfriend in my junior year of high school had more game than the guys I’ve seen more recently, since my mid-twenties. My high school boyfriend wrote me letters of several pages where he would talk about his day or where he wanted to take me on a date. They were sweet, innocent expressions of love where he shared what was going through his mind and how he was feeling.

While I do my best to communicate meaningfully through text, that’s not everybody, if my few experiences with guys are an accurate representation of the rest of them in the dating pool. The lack of communication affects not only the phone and text, but real life as well. I find myself wondering if it started with texting.

I understand the dread factor that a ringing phone can evoke, but at least when we had no choice but to call the other person, we held on to our communication skills and consideration for the human being on the other side of the line. It was easier to pick up on how the other person felt through their tone of voice, and there was not so much evasive behavior as there can be these days when most communication is via text. In my school days (the days of landline phones), yes, sometimes it could be really awkward when conversations were more difficult or heading toward a breakup, but at least we still had to communicate enough to get that sense of closure if things were over. Or if things were going well, we knew that better too.

When you text, especially if you haven’t met in-person yet, you’re less of a human being to the other person. They feel like they can say anything they want, as indicated by some of the horror stories people on dating apps have shared.

Rather than using text meaningfully, most people use it to hide.

It sort of makes me wish I had kept the love letters in that Sephora box, not for sentimental reasons, but to give me hope when someone can barely spell “cat” or uses emojis like hieroglyphs.

Swipe, message, meet, fizzle out, repeat.
Swipe, message, meet, fizzle out, repeat. | Source

Dating Apps Can Be Overwhelming, Used for the Wrong Reasons

The desire to be loved, truly and deeply, is universal across all human beings.

The problem with technology influencing romance is that it can be overwhelming and encourage unhealthy, attention-seeking behavior. Mix a dating app with low self-esteem, lack of self-discipline and self-control, and you have a dangerous cocktail that will damage yourself and others. On most of the dating apps I have seen, there is no limit on how many people you can match with at one time. Before you know it, you’re getting a lot of interest in your profile, which can feel very good at first. Unfortunately, it quickly becomes just another distraction. Your notifications on your phone start vying for your attention, even if you’re out with one of your potentials.

Rather than your focus being on the people you’re meeting and understanding your level of interest in them, it’s about the attention you’re receiving and how validated you feel. As a result, you don’t get a good sense of any of the people you meet. Connections crash and burn, or they fizzle out entirely for no particular reason.

Of course, this isn’t the fault of the dating app. It’s all down to how a person chooses to use it, but perhaps the developers putting a few restrictions on them (for instance, only being able to match with 1-3 people at once, so that yeses are used more wisely) wouldn’t hurt. I have been off dating apps for a couple of years now, so maybe this feature does exist somewhere and I’m just not up-to-date.

Having an endless stream of matches that never go anywhere or even remotely toward getting to know another person in any depth can create jaded, bitter people who are convinced that there are no good men or women left in the world.

We all want love, but we are going about receiving it in the wrong ways. We equate “likes” with love, and the more that we get, the better. But we don’t stop to consider that the “like” or “yes” on our profile was only a momentary response. We focus more on the fleeting approvals than long-term connections, and then we wonder why we feel so empty.

Has this happened to you, too?
Has this happened to you, too? | Source

It’s Too Easy to Run Away

When it comes to online dating especially, it can sometimes be good that we don’t run much risk of seeing certain people in our day-to-day lives. The ability to block people who are harassing or otherwise abusive is good too. For most others in situations that don’t work out, at least caring enough to give a reason for breaking things off or saying goodbye and sending well wishes is a nice gesture. Unfortunately, this is a gesture that often is missed. It can really mess with people.

A friend of mine met a woman at a speed dating event and felt like they were hitting it off pretty well. They were laughing and relating to one another a lot. At the end of the event, each person turned in a list of the people they liked and got notified if the feeling was mutual. When my friend learned that his lady of interest marked “yes” for him, he sent her an e-mail, then never heard from her.

Granted, sometimes e-mails don’t go through. But how many people hide behind technological mishaps just because they’re too afraid to be honest or have a challenging conversation? Why is it so hard to say, “Hey, I really enjoyed getting to know you, but after giving it more thought, I don’t feel ready to date anyone”? It would save the other person the unpleasant experience of obsessing over what they did wrong or what happened when things seemed to be going so well before.

When we don’t have much chance of seeing a person face-to-face, whether at work or a chance encounter at the grocery store, again, maybe they feel less human. It is easy to “ghost” and forget common courtesy, because we don’t have to confront the consequences of our actions. We don’t have to see the human, emotional side of the other person, so it’s like we forget it’s there or it’s easier to disregard.

The golden rule is drilled into us when we are children, but still, we manage to forget it.

Tips for a Better Experience

I have been guilty of all the above vices when it comes to dating, so I am not saying I am an angel or was never a part of the problem. But awareness is part of resolving the problem.

Modern dating sucks for many reasons, and this could be part one in an entire series if enough people enjoy this article and let me know that. It doesn’t have to suck, but we need to become more aware of the ways we’re treating others that we don’t want to be treated. We have to become aware of how we’re pushing away love or failing to love ourselves when we’re desperate for “likes” and comments on photos.

If you meet someone and really like them, let them know it. Pick up the phone and actually call them sometimes. Be communicative and express your feelings. This isn’t true just for dating, but for all relationships where there is a sense of disconnect.

Be open and know that it may take a few frogs before you find your prince or princess, but don’t get lost in swiping through an endless stream of profiles and pictures.

If you feel comfortable, please share your experiences with this subject in the comments below and what your takeaway from it all has been.

 

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy my new book, Angel with a Broken Wing on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

Instagram: @phicklephilly    Facebook: phicklephilly    Twitter: @phicklephilly