Romantic Thanksgiving Date Ideas

A lot of people believe that Thanksgiving isn’t Thanksgiving unless you spend it stuffing yourself silly with food, surrounded by annoying uncles and aunts. But for couples without children or whose families are far away, Thanksgiving can be a wonderful opportunity to spend some romantic time together without distractions. So skip all of the stress this Thanksgiving and plan a special day for just the two of you with one of the ideas below.

Cook a meal together for two

While playing hostess to your in-laws and simultaneously cooking a Thanksgiving meal for 10 may seem like a recipe for a panic attack, cooking a turkey together with your best guy is filled with sexy opportunities. Envision sipping wine together as you stir the cranberry sauce and let your imagination run wild!

Have someone cook a meal for you

For those of you who think cooking is a chore rather than a delight, there’s nothing like enjoying a Thanksgiving dinner out on the town. Simply make a reservation, show-up and voila! While other women are spending the day slaving over a stove, you and your man can enjoy all of the pleasures of eating a five-course, candle-lit meal with none of the work.

Stay at a B&B

Holidays are so few and far between, why not extend your Thanksgiving into a Thanks-weekend and spend four days being thankful you’re not at home?

Go somewhere warm

Or even better, chuck the idea of a traditionally chilly Thanksgiving and relax the weekend away, basking in the sun at a tropical resort. The trees may not change color in Florida or the Bahamas, but there is still a lot of holiday cheer to be found there.

Watch a parade

You don’t even need to go anywhere to enjoy a romantic Thanksgiving. Sipping hot chocolate and holding hands together while watching a local parade can be just as lovely.

Or snuggle on the couch

Don’t even get dressed! Thanksgiving is one holiday that’s made for sleeping in, so don’t hesitate to ignore that alarm for once. You can always TiVo the parade and watch it later.

Volunteer at a soup kitchen

For couples in pursuit of the true meaning of Thanksgiving, soup kitchens and charity organizations are always in need of volunteers on the holiday when attendance is even higher than usual.

Go see a movie

One of my favorite Thanksgiving traditions is going out to the movies with my boyfriend, just the two of us.

 

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The 3-Day Rule Is the Worst Piece of Dating Advice, and We Should All Stop Following It

Picture it: You go on a first date, the conversation is flowing, and you can already tell you have some sort of connection with this person. They’re someone you hope to see again, and you’re pretty positive they feel the same way. However, there’s just one thing — you have to wait three days to talk to them again. Why? Well, because of the well-known and long-standing (but pretty much outdated) three-day dating “rule.”

If you like someone, tell them. If you didn’t feel a connection on the date, tell them. Talk to them when you want to talk to them instead of waiting because of some stupid rule

The guideline came about to direct people on how to handle communication following a first date. After all, you couldn’t possibly contact someone too soon without running the risk of looking desperate, especially a woman reaching out to a man first (the scandal!). Texting or calling someone the day after a date? Forget it. What about the second day? No, you still look too eager. But day three is just right, according to this rule.

This led to the mentality that you have to keep a person guessing how you feel about them, because if they knew how much you liked them, or that you even liked them at all, that would come off as unattractive. This kind of childish thinking is what can kill a potentially good relationship. These days, with social media, texting, and a culture that’s seemingly always connected, why are people still fueling an I’m-so-cool-I-didn’t-contact-you outdated game?

When I used to be on dating apps, I thought if a conversation died down for a few days, at least one of us wasn’t really feeling it. That was fine, but then if the person reappeared, well, that was just a back-and-forth situation I was not there for. The truth is, with so many options at our fingertips (thanks, Tinder), how do we know if someone is actually following the three-day rule or just forgot about you for a minute while they talked to someone new?

Let’s keep it simple: the three-day dating rule is straight up a waste of time. If you like someone, tell them. If you didn’t feel a connection on the date, tell them. Talk to them when you want to talk to them instead of waiting because of some stupid rule. There’s no benefit in playing hard to get if you, in fact, want some sort of future with the person. So let’s make a new rule: if you’re into someone, don’t be afraid to be the first person to reach out following a great first date. Life is too short to play unnecessary games. The worst that could happen is they don’t feel the same way, and if that does happen, you can rest easy knowing you didn’t waste more time thinking about someone who wasn’t right for you. It’s a win-win.

 

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What Is Glamboozling? This Dating Trend Is Unbelievably Annoying

I kind of like saying the word, Glamboozle…

With all of the wacky dating trends that happen in the world, I feel like I’ll never run out of material for this blog!

It sucks being all dressed up with nowhere to go. But do you know what sucks worse? Getting all dressed up with the intention of going somewhere, only to have your date cancel at the last minute. If this has ever happened to you, then I’m sorry to say you’ve been subject to a dating trend called glamboozling. Glamboozling means that you’ve blown out your hair, given yourself a mani, and even spent 30 minutes perfecting your winged eyeliner only for your date to send a text saying, “Sry. Can’t make it tonight.” And honestly, I can think of few things worse than wasting a great cat eye because of an unreliable date.

According to Plenty of Fish, a staggering 58% of singles have been glamboozled. As Anita Chlipala, licensed marriage and family therapist, previously told Elite Daily, canceling plans on the day of should only be done if you have a really valid excuse — and if you don’t have one, then your date deserves more notice. “[You] should have a good reason to cancel a date last-minute, because otherwise, that’s just rude and inconsiderate,” she said. And not only does flaking on a date pose an inconvenience — it’s also a terrible waste of makeup.

Glamboozling is a new dating trend
Ashley Corbin-Teich/Image Source/Getty Images

Luckily, if you want to avoid being glamboozled, there are a few signs that indicate your date is likely to cancel. According to Julia Armet, Head of Matchmaking at Tawkify, if your date has already postponed your meet-up once, there’s a good chance they’ll do it again. “Avoidant types have trouble solidifying plans,” Armet previously told Elite Daily. “Interestingly, you’ll also see the same ‘postponement’ mentality in people who have commitment issues. That can emerge deeper into relationships. Odds would say for these types: they’ll flake on you.” So basically, you shouldn’t get dressed up in your best outfit if the person taking you out has asked for a rain check in the past.

Another sign your date is probably going to flake: They’re difficult to get a hold of the day of the date. If you haven’t heard from them at least an hour before your date, then you might want to wait before curling your eyelashes. And if you want to make sure you’re not stood up, Armet suggested texting or calling your date ahead of time to make sure they’re still on board.

Glamboozling is a new dating trend
visualspace/E+/Getty Images

Of course, the reason glamboozling stings so bad doesn’t just have to do with wasting a good hair day. As Dr. Alexandra Solomon, clinical assistant professor in the Department of Psychology at Northwestern University, previously told Elite Daily, when a date cancels on you, it can ignite feelings of vulnerability, whether it’s your first date or your 100th date with someone. You might feel as though your date doesn’t value your time or prioritize your relationship, no matter how serious that relationship may be, and that’s not a great feeling.

My advice: If you’re glamboozled, find an opportunity to show off your outfit anyway. Rather than sulking, the best way to beat this dating trend is to call up a friend and make other plans. You can’t always prevent a date from being canceled last minute, but you can decide how you’re going to react.

 

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You’ll Never Find True Love If You Keep Making These 11 Mistakes

here’s a reason you keep attracting the wrong people.

When it comes to love and being in a relationship, attraction plays a huge role.

Are you trying hard to find love and build a healthy relationship but nothing you do is working?

You may be doing a bunch of things that are blocking genuine and true love from entering your life.

So, if you’re asking yourself, “Why can’t I find love?” and “Will I ever find love?”, you need to be aware of what you’re doing wrong and what healthy relationships really need.

So, here are 11 fatal attraction mistakes that stop you from finding love and building a genuine relationship.

1. Holding on to old relationships

Always let go and move forward from past relationships. Holding on only blocks you from moving forward. Focus on the lessons you learned from that relationship and bring that with you but leave the rest behind.

Don’t treat new relationships any different because of past hurt. Don’t take out previous pain on a new partner. Really work that out before you move on. Take the lessons you learned but leave the rest behind and start fresh with each new person.

You want to move forward and not stay stuck in the past. You can never do that if you are replaying the past and criticizing past mistakes. Either regretting the past or wishing you were still in it will always block you from moving forward.

If you are hanging on to old relationships you are closing the space for a new love to come in. Work through and fully grieve old relationships so you can open up space to move forward with a new love.

2. Lack of self-love

It’s so important to love yourself first because if you don’t love you, you cannot attract others who will love you. If you aren’t treating yourself right you won’t attract others who will treat you right.

Take a good look at how you are treating yourself.

Negative self talk? That will attract others who will talk down to you. Not trusting or believing in yourself? That will attract others who won’t trust you or that you won’t trust.

3. Living in energies that repel love

Before you can attract anything into your life, you must add more of that same energy to your life. Are you looking for stability when it comes to love? If so, look at where you are unstable in your life and make changes.

If any element of your life is unstable, it’s very important to work on that. Instability will only attract someone who is unstable. Really look closely at each area of your life and take new steps to work on any areas that aren’t stable.

This goes for anything you are looking for in love, fun, comfort, etc. Whatever it is you are looking to attract in a partner, really focus on, adding more of that into your life in all areas.

We are whole beings and must align every area of our life to what we want, not just the one area we are working on.

4. Too much focus on everyone else’s problems

Don’t focus on other people and what they are doing to you. Focus on what you are doing to attract them in the first place. We only have control over ourselves, no one else.

Nothing ever just happens to us, we create everything in our life with our choices. The good news is by making some new choices you can get what you want.

5. Feeling desperate

Desperation when looking for love will only lead you into desperate situations and attract those who will only hurt you.

Know that happiness can only be found in yourself. Do not expect love to fill your happiness need. Yes, love can make you happy but it’s the cherry on top after you have found your happiness inside of you first.

Being happy within yourself and not needing love to fulfill you is the best way to attract love to you. Looking for anyone else to fulfill you will never lead to anything and will only leave you empty inside.

The beautiful thing is that you can find love and happiness within yourself without needing anyone else. Focus on your passion and your purpose and that will lead you there.

6. Not fully expressing yourself

When you keep things in and don’t express yourself you aren’t being your genuine self and can never attract real genuine love.

Be yourself and say what you feel when you feel it. You want to attract someone who will fall in love with you, not with who you are pretending to be.

7. Seeing yourself as having baggage

We have all made mistakes and have a past. See it as all learning experiences that made you the wonderful person you are now.

When you see it as baggage, a weight, or a problem, you put out to the world that you aren’t worthy.

Instead, be thankful for all you have learned and gained from those experiences and put that foot forward.

8. Only focusing on the negatives in your life

Focusing on the negative will only attract more negative to you, especially in relationships. Every negative thing you go through is there to teach you something to lead you to a better place.

Look for the lessons in these negative experiences and make new choices to get out of them instead of just dwelling and lingering in them. They are always a tool to move onto a better life but you must look deep and find those lessons and make the necessary changes.

There is always a new choice you can make as a step out of any situation. Focus on the positives and what you do have so you can attract more positive into your life.

This especially applies to negative thoughts about yourself. Being happy with yourself is so important in attracting the right person for you. If you aren’t happy with yourself, the person you attract cannot ever be completely happy with you either.

9. Not having fun in your life

Fun and laughter are big love attraction magnets.

Think about it: aren’t you more attracted to someone who is happy and having fun? Purposely find ways to have more fun and laugh in whatever way works for you.

10. Not taking care of yourself

Nurture and be sure not to neglect yourself. When you neglect yourself you can only attract those who will neglect you as well.

You must always put yourself first so you will have more to give to others. Always put your oxygen mask on first.

11. Expecting love to save you

Love is two whole people who come together to make things even better for each other. Never expect someone to come in and save you or make you feel fulfilled inside.

Only you can find your own happiness and fulfillment. No one can magically do that for you.

But, once you have found that in yourself, love can help that grow even more and it’s the perfect cherry at the top of the sundae. But you must build that sundae by yourself first!

Kristine Carlson is a psychic medium, an Advanced Soul Realignment Practitioner, and author. If you would like some answers about your love life or anything else, you can get a convenient, personal email reading or clearing from Kristine on her website.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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7 Things You Need to Know If You’re Dating Someone With Kids

How to Approach Dating a Person Who Has Children from Another Relationship

Dating someone new definitely has its challenges: assessing your compatibility, getting comfortable enough to let your guard down, discovering your differences, and coping with new relationship anxiety. Add a kid or two into the mix, though, and it’s a whole different ball game.

“Dating someone with kids is a package deal,” says NYC-based relationship expert Susan Winter. “Even when your date has limited or partial custody, their children play a significant role in their long-term partner selection process.”

Not only will their kids probably play influence who they allow into their lives, but it’ll probably affect how they function in a relationship, too.

“They have people that physically and emotionally need them in order to survive,” explains Mike Goldstein, founder of EZ Dating Coach. “You will always be priority number two, no matter how hard you fight for the top spot.”

So if you’re in the midst of getting to know someone with children from a previous relationship, here are a few different things to kind in mind before you get too deep.

1. You may not get as much quality time alone as you’d like

If you’re the kind of person who requires a lot of attention from your partner, you’ll need to come to terms with the fact that other people are also vying for their time. Just how much room they have in their calendar for you will depend on how many kids they have, as well as what their ages are.

Chances are you won’t be able to plan date nights as often as you’d like. Keep in mind, however, that this could also be a positive thing.

“If you love your alone time, this will be a huge bonus for you,” says Goldstein. “And if you enjoy planning, this will be a great exercise in coordination to work around each other’s schedules.”

2. Keeping it casual probably isn’t an option

Point blank, a single parent is more likely to be looking for something serious when dating around.

“Dating involves the possibility of integrating a person into the family system,” explains Winter. “This is done with caution, over time, and with much consideration.”

This is why you should be sure to clarify your intentions early on before you meet their kids.

“It’s important that their kids not be exposed to many people coming in and out of their parent’s life,” adds Dr. Gary Brown, a prominent couples’ therapist in Los Angeles.

On the plus side, as those dating with kids tend not to take the situation lightly, you can rest easy knowing that they’ll be in it for the long haul.

“You get the almost automatic benefit of knowing that the person you are dating is into you because time is precious in their lives, and they will likely not want to spend it with you unless they think there is something meaningful there,” adds Brown.

3. You probably won’t meet the kids right away

Don’t be alarmed if your partner isn’t ready to introduce you to their children right away. After all, they will likely want to make sure the relationship feels stable and you’re both on the same page about the future.

“Parents are naturally protective of their kids and need to screen who they are dating before introducing them to their children,” explains Brown. That’s why he says to make sure you “avoid the tendency to try and push for a premature commitment on their part.”

“You will likely need to take things somewhat slower.” adds Brown.

Rather than pressuring them to let you meet the kids, focus on doing whatever you can to build trust. By doing that, you’ll help them feel ready to take that step.

4. Be prepared for plans to change on a dime

Kids add a certain element of unpredictability to life, so at some point, your partner may need to bail on date night at the last minute.

“Anything can happen that will alter your plans unexpectedly,” explains Winter. “Health issues, school or behavioral problems can eliminate that romantic holiday you booked months ago. That’s why you have to have a flexible disposition to date someone with kids.”

Try not to take it personally when they need to take a rain check. It’s not that they don’t value their plans with you … it’s just that their kids come first.

5. Being spontaneous won’t be easy

And speaking of plans, the best way to handle dating someone with kids is to choose specific dates and times to meet up. As much as you may want to whisk them away for a weekend, that probably isn’t realistic. After all, they may need to make special arrangements in order to spend time with you.

“The two of you may not be able to act as spontaneously as you might like,” says Brown. “That doesn’t mean that you can’t have a night out or a weekend away. It simply means that you will have to take the logistics of child-care into consideration.”

6. The way to their heart might be through their kids

When you start connecting with your partner’s children, don’t be surprised if you see a smile whenever you’re around the little ones. Basically, that twinkle says they’re falling, as for most parents, seeing someone bond and build trust with their kids only strengthens their decision to be with you.

“Your [partner] may very well appreciate it if you take a genuine interest in their children,” says Brown. “This will likely earn you bonus points as their children are very central to their lives.”

On the contrary, Winter notes that if you don’t get along with your partner’s children, that could create some friction that jeopardizes your relationship. While you don’t need to win them over right away, you’ll eventually need to be able to coexist peacefully.

7. Don’t expect constant contact

With technology at our fingertips, we’re used to getting immediate replies to texts, social media messages and so on. But when you date someone with kids, you’ll need to adjust your expectations for response times a bit.

“When you’re a parent, your time isn’t always your own,” notes Brown.

There may be times when your partner is tied up caring for a kid who isn’t feeling well, or helping them with their homework. That means it’s important to understand that they won’t always be able to get back to you right away.

Clearly, there are distinctive drawbacks that come with dating a parent, but there are also numerous benefits as well. Goldstein notes that parents often have a certain level of patience and selflessness that can definitely play to your advantage in a romantic relationship. Not only that, but Brown points out that you’ll have the opportunity to see a different side of your partner. Their title as a parent will allow you to learn a lot more about their character and values early on just by observing how they interact with their children.

“There is always the possibility that you may fall in love not only with the person you are dating, but their kids as well,” adds Brown.

Dating someone with kids can be an incredibly unique and rewarding experience — as long as you keep these particular considerations in mind. And remember: A parent has already given their heart to their children. Now, they have to decide if there’s room for you, too.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

My new book, Angel with a Broken Wing is now for sale on Amazon!

 

https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

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