6 Mistakes You Make That Land You In The Friend Zone

The Friend Zone is a place we all have dreaded to visit. But you could accidentally land up just there.

You try to play it cool on the first few dates because you don’t want to be deemed “needy”, “high maintenance”, “aggressive”, or “desperate”.

You make a point at highlighting your common interests. You both like football, you both like the art fair on Sundays, you are both foodies so you stay on that common ground of topics because they are safe and surface and fun and easy to talk about.

At the end of the date, you go “dutch”, hug, say goodbye, and you feel like you had a pretty great date. And it was a great time…for friends.

Where is the romance? What happened to the wooing?

Beware: you very well could be on the brink of falling into the friend zone!

Knowing how to get out of the friend zone is all about setting the precedent from the onset.

Here are the 6 mistakes, each of which could land you in the friend zone:

1. You went “Dutch”.

Do you want a friend, a colleague, a business partner or do you want a relationship partner?

He is paying for dinner. Paying = providing (masculine). Cooking/gifting = nurturing (feminine). We will go more into this (plus alternative ways that the woman can “pay”) in a future article.

2. You talk about fun and surface topics.

If you eventually want the clothes to come off, you’ve got to dig beyond the exterior by being real and getting raw. That’s how you stand out and create a heart connection.

3. You forgot to flirt!

It’s about the little things — the side glance, the “secret smile”, the little touches, and the flirtatious and slightly (but not overtly) sexy comments.

4. You act like a buddy.

Hanging out at sports bars, not putting effort into how you look, going dutch; these are all symptoms of friendships. It’s OK to share the same interests.

Women, it’s OK if you are a huge sports fan. But remember that you are looking for a boyfriend, not a buddy. You can still be sexy and cheer on your favorite team.

5. You think you’re being sarcastic, but you’re actually being a bitch or a jerk.

I know you want to be witty and always have a comeback, and I agree! That banter can be extremely sexy and can be a great technique when it comes to flirting.

But there is a difference between sarcastic and being bitchy or a jerk, and it’s too often confused. Take the edge off. Imagine that they said to you what you said to them.

How does it sound?

6. You’re easy going…too easy going.

You don’t require dates. You just kind of “hang out”. You’re missing the chase and moving right into what you consider to be “relationship mode”. But you’re wrong. You’ve been friend zoned.

Honestly, a lot of it is about gender roles. Be feminine. Be masculine. Be in your gender power!

The more feminine you are, the more masculine he feels. The more masculine you are, the more feminine she feels.

Stop being androgynous. I know. it’s a modern world. But you have more power in your gender role than you ever allowed yourself to embrace.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

You can check out my books here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

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What to Text a Girl You Just Met to Ensure She Texts You Back

Congratulations! She gave you her number, but now you need to know what to text a girl you just met. Lucky for you, I have all the answers.

Before we get into what to text a girl you just met, relax for a second and congratulate yourself. You met a girl and she gave you her number. You are already doing amazing.

So, try not to freak out. There is no perfect thing to say or miracle sentence that will get her to date you or even text back. Just breathe and take a second.

This is just a text. It is not something you need to fester over for hours. 

Texting a girl you just met

When it comes to texting a girl you just met, it is not all that complicated. Relax! It is actually pretty hard to screw up.

As long as you stay true to who you are and how you were when you met, things should go swimmingly. But, just in case you need some extra guidance, there are things to avoid.

One thing you should not text a girl you just met is anything sexual. I don’t care how confident or horny you are feeling, that is never appropriate. This girl gave you her number which is a private thing, so respect that.

Next, don’t immediately ask her out. That may be your end game but have a little bit of a conversation first. You don’t have to talk for days before making your move but a brief conversation will be smoother.

Also, do not wait for days to text her. In the 80s or 90s, it was “cool” to wait three days before calling, but we’re like two decades into the new century and everything is instant. If her Uber Eats driver can get her McDonalds in under 15 minutes, you can text her within a reasonable amount of time.

It doesn’t have to be as soon as she leaves wherever you met, but maybe once you get home for the night or after work. Text her within 24 hours of meeting so that you are fresh in her mind. If you wait too long you won’t look cool, she will think you aren’t that interested.

These are just some basic essentials to stick to when figuring out what to text a girl you just met, but let’s get into some more specific options.

What to text a girl you just met.

The main goal of texting a girl you just met is to get a text back. That is the number one priority. From there, worry about asking her out and setting up a date, but for now, focus on the first text you send a girl you just met.

What should your first text say?

#1 The classic. Keep it short and sweet. This text does not define your future. You do not have to come up with something unbelievably amazing. Simply say, “Hi it’s *YOUR NAME HERE* from *LOCATION YOU MET HERE*. I had a great time talking to you today.”

It may seem boring, but it gets the point across and shows your interest. 

#2 The flirt. Jumping right into the first text with something a bit more flirtatious will definitely catch her attention. If you were doing some heavy-duty flirting when you first met, this may be the ideal way to go.

You don’t have to be over the top with this. Simply say something like, “Hey it’s *YOUR NAME HERE*. You know, the guy you couldn’t stop staring at today.”

This introduces your personality and gets the conversation off to a good start.

#3 The clever. If you are full of sarcasm and humor, introducing your texting relationship with a joke is ideal. It will give her a good idea of what’s to come, and humor is always a wonderful way to keep a conversation flowing.

Something like this is cute and clever, “This is an automated message from *YOUR NAME HERE*. Reply YES if you wish to receive future messages. Reply STOP to end all future communication with *YOUR NAME HERE*.”

If someone sent this to me after meeting I would definitely reply yes. And I know this isn’t what you want to think about, but this gives them a chance to let you know if they’re not interested without ghosting.

#4 The compliment. Go with a solid compliment, but try not to make it solely superficial. You can tell any girl she is pretty or you couldn’t help but notice her, but complimenting something deeper you noticed when you met her will show that you were really paying attention.

Try something like, “Hi, it’s *YOUR NAME HERE*. I couldn’t wait to get home to text you. I was really impressed by your positivity today.”

This can be anything from her success in business to her dedication or intelligence. She will appreciate a compliment like that more than any physical one. But, avoid saying she is not like other girls. That is not a compliment, but a dig at other girls.

#5 The continuation. Pick up where you left off. She probably gave you her number because you were having a pretty good conversation when you met, so use what works. Continue on with what you were talking about or doing when you met.

A text like, “Hey it’s *YOUR NAME HERE*. Did you end up catching that game? Crazy, right?” or “I looked up what you mentioned earlier, I can’t believe it. How did you find out about that?” should do the trick.

This really helps ensure you will get a reply because it is open-ended. 

What to text a girl you just met after she responds

If she responded to your first text, you are in the clear. Relax. She answered which means she is likely at least a little interested. You don’t need to try to impress her, just be yourself.

You can either carry out the conversation a while and get to know her better or ease into an ask out right away.

If you want her to know you are interested in dating her, make that clear. Say something like, “I would love to continue this conversation over drinks.” This will show that you don’t want a virtual pen pal, but you intend to see her again.

Not everyone is keen on meeting up again so soon so if that’s you, don’t worry. You don’t need to ask her out right now. Carry out your conversation a little, and when the time seems right, ask her out.

Maybe she said she just made dinner or came home from dinner.  Ask her what she had and then recommend a great restaurant you know that you would love to take her to. A smooth transition like that makes it less of a shock.

Texting a girl you just met does not have to be this anxiety-filled experience. Remind yourself that she gave you her number because she wanted to hear from you.

As long as you stay confident and true to yourself, you will know exactly what to text a girl you just met to ensure she responds.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

You can check out my books here: https://www.amazon.com/s?k=charles+wiedenmann&ref=nb_sb_noss_1

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How to Flirt with a Coworker Subtly & Learn How they Feel About You

Having a crush on a colleague is hard. You see them every day! Learn how to flirt with a coworker subtly, if you want to move things along.

Ah, that awkward but common situation—having a crush on someone you work with. We’ve all been there at some stage, but did you ever try to move things along and find out if they felt the same way? If so, did it work? If it didn’t, learn how to flirt with a coworker subtly.

The biggest problem with this situation is that if you flirt up a storm and it doesn’t go your way, you continue to see them on a daily basis. It may make life difficult and embarrassing, and as a result, your work may suffer.

Of course, that’s the negative side. The positive? They might feel the same way and you could find yourselves the new hottest couple on the block!

Know your office HR policies

Learning how to flirt with a coworker is about subtleness. It’s a difficult line to walk in many ways, but with a little practice and dedication, you’ll get there. But first, are you actually allowed to have relationships with coworkers?

Not every workplace allows relationships between coworkers, and it varies from place to place as to whether it’s prohibited or allowed. While most workplaces are a little more lenient these days than they were before, it’s still an unspoken rule in many cases.

It could also be that relationships or unions between different staff grades are frowned upon. You can argue until you’re blue in the face whether it’s right or not, but rules are rules. If your job is important to you *hopefully it will be*, then you need to know where you stand before you even attempt to try and flirt up a storm with the apple of your eye.

Most workplaces have a code of conduct manual or document so simply check things out beforehand, but in the most subtle of ways!

Assuming you’ve done that and you know that coworker dalliances aren’t frowned upon, what else do you need to know? Oh, the fact that you’re potentially playing with fire.

Yes, more negatives, but I want you to be armed and prepared before you go into flirting battle.

What if it goes wrong?

I hate being negative, but think about the possibility that either this person doesn’t like you back in the same way, or things go well and suddenly turns sour. Remember, relationships or not, hook up or not, you see this person on a daily basis at work and that could be excruciating for you in some situations.

Your job is important, and whether or not you see yourself staying with that company for the rest of your working days or not, it’s important to be professional and do your best while there. You’re not going to be able to do that if you cringe every time they walk into the office. This could be even worse if you must work very closely with this person.

Of course, it could be equally as excruciating if your crush turns into a full blown love that you must keep quiet because you’re working with this person, and you’re scared to make a move.

The only thing you can do is go with what feels right and what you know you can live with. I had a crush on one of my work colleagues. I told him after we’d bumped into each other in a bar and had a drunken kiss that literally made my life up until that point.

It didn’t work out for me, and it was so embarrassing for so long, but thankfully I didn’t have to work closely with him. I got over it, and while I no longer work there, that wasn’t the reason I left.

So, make your decision, and move towards the successful, but subtle, flirting plan.

How to flirt with a coworker in a subtle, yet successful way

There are four main areas to this tactic:

#1 Body language.
#2 Selective verbal clues.
#3 Creating an air of mystery and sexual tension.
#4 Taking the flirting out of the workplace.

Body language and selective verbal clues are things you can do every single day. It builds up the mystery and sexual tension, which can be taken out of the workplace. For example, suggesting you meet up for a drink after work to discuss a project. Of course, you’re not going to discuss a project, you’re going to flirt a little harder!

Remember, learning how to flirt with a coworker is all about being subtle. Whether or not relationships and unions are allowed in your workplace or not, don’t go around being blatantly obvious about what you want. You are being paid to be professional at work!

A few useful ways to use body language and selective verbal clues are:

– Make eye contact when you speak

– Gently touch them on the arm when you’re speaking

– Bite your lip when you’re listening to them talk

– Show interest in what they have to say

– Get them a coffee or a drink whenever you get one for yourself

– Ask them how their evening was on a regular basis, i.e. showing interest

– Nudge them gently in a playful manner

– Identify mutual hobbies or things of interest and focus on talking about them

As you can see, these aren’t ‘in your face’ flirting techniques. They do get you closer to your crush and show a connection you don’t have with anyone else. By doing this, you create a little tension. Take the flirting up a notch, with eye contact, gentle touching, and lip biting.

Obviously, I don’t have to tell you that you shouldn’t go around touching people if they don’t seem comfortable with it, or in a way which would be deemed inappropriate. Remember, you’re at work! A gentle, but fleeting, hand on the arm when making a point is as far as you should go.

Time to take the plunge

Once you’re sure that your coworker has grasped the idea that you’re flirting and not just being very friendly, and you see signs of flirting coming back your way, suggest a meeting outside of work. Now, as subtle as the rest of the flirting has been, continue the theme when you ask them out.

Keep work ingrained within it if you can. You can back out if they refuse. This will save your face in a big way!

For instance, suggest you meet for a coffee or a drink in the bar across the road after work to continue brainstorming ideas for the project you’re both working on. Or, mention that you’re going to a new bar and they should pop in and check it out for themselves if they’re in the area. Keep it casual. Don’t let on that it’s actually a date you’re suggesting.

Learning how to flirt with a coworker can be difficult. You might not feel you’re showing your crush that you’re interested. The subtle route lets you veil your attempts, providing you an embarrassment safety net.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

My new books, Phicklephilly 2 and Sun Stories: Tales from a Tanning Salon are now for sale on Amazon!

 

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Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

 

7 Ways To Catch A Woman’s Attention (And Keep It!)

It takes more than flirting.

As a man, there’s a harsh truth that I have to admit: most men are terrible at flirting.

Are there exceptions to that rule? Of course.

Whenever a man is struggling to flirt with a girl, there always seems to be a suave Brazilian helicopter pilot nearby who can swoop in and talk about anything.

However, that doesn’t mean all hope is lost, dudes. If you really want to know how to get a girl to like you, flirting isn’t the answer.

That sounds counter-productive, but there’s only so far you can get with a woman by tenaciously pursuing her. If she wasn’t interested in the first place, she’s going to put an end to that really fast.

The key is making her do an equal share of the work. You need to make a girl want you as much as you want her.

But how do you do accomplish that? How you do convince a woman that she should be attracted to you? If you’re struggling to figure out how to attract women, here are 7 techniques that will show her that will make a girl like you.

1. Be curious.

Ask her about herself. Be genuinely interested in learning about her life and the things that are important to her.

Don’t be a creepy stalker about it, but show her that you actually care enough to ask follow-up questions.

2. Have a life of your own.

The flip-side of being curious is being prepared to answer questions about yourself. And the last thing you want to do if a woman wants to know more about you is to act bored about your own life.

Don’t respond with shrugs or say “I don’t have much going on.”

Have stuff going on. Have passions, interests, things you’re excited to talk about. Give her a reason to want to know more about you.

3. Take care of yourself.

Presentation matters. You don’t have to be the most attractive guy in the world.

Women, bless them, have a long history of being okay with dating beneath their own level of hotness. But if they’re willing to overlook your love handles and thinning hair, you need to show some effort.

Keep the hygiene on point. Get a haircut. And don’t always wear the same hoodie. Show her that you actually know how to take care of yourself.

4. Pay attention to her.

This doesn’t mean that you should stare at her until she gets uncomfortable. But you do want to show her that you’re listening.

If she’s telling a story, listen to it — and chime in with questions when appropriate. If you’re out with friends and she mentions a favorite drink, grab her one the next time you’re at the bar.

Let her know that she’s interesting enough to command your attention.

5. Let her see the best of you.

Think about this: what is your best self? Or when do you act like your favorite version of yourself? Is it when you’re out with friends? Is it playing a sport? Is it hiking, doing charity, or just hanging out watching movies?

When possible, you want the woman you’re interested to see you at your best. So invite her out with your best friends. Or suggest going to a concert of your favorite band. Find opportunities to show her your most confident and happy self.

6. Make her laugh… in the right way.

“Women love a sense of humor” is an old cliché, but it’s true. Being funny can be a really attractive quality if you do it right.

You definitely don’t want to be funny in a mean way.

Remember, show her your best. So, no making fun of people or making raw rude jokes. If you’re going to mock someone, mock yourself.

Make sure that she knows that your humor comes with a side of empathy and self-awareness, but, you know… be really funny too.

7. Flirt a little bit.

I know I said flirting wasn’t the answer, but what I meant was, it’s not the answer. When the moment presents itself, it’s not a bad thing to let a woman know that you see her as an attractive person.

Keep things casual. Maybe just compliment her. Or tell her, “Wow, you look great tonight.” But leave it there — don’t overdo it.

Just offer enough that she can tell that you think she’s awesome, but don’t actively hit on her to the point where she’s going to be uncomfortable hanging out with you anymore.

If she picks up on the small openings you’re giving her, she’ll find a way to let you know that she’s interested too.

And if she doesn’t, well… it wasn’t meant to be.

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy my new book, Angel with a Broken Wing is now for sale on Amazon!

 

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These 16 Flirty Texts Will Keep You On His Mind 24/7

He’ll be begging for more.

Keeping your sex life fun, exciting and hot is crucial if you never want the initial spark in your relationship to fade.

To help you out, I put together this list of flirty texts to send your partner whenever you feel like things between you could use a little jolt.

And this isn’t just a bunch of flirty text message examples, but also a handy guide on how to flirt with a guy over text in general.

You can also use as ideas to try sending him over Facebook Messenger, email, Instagram, Snapchat, or even when talking to him on the phone.

Before I actually get to the list of flirty texts for him, I need to first give you three little disclaimers about sending flirty texts. This is so that when you use them, they are super effective — and also in oder to make sure you don’t accidentally misuse them.

The most important thing to know when learning how to flirt over text messages is that flirty texts should be used as a spice, not as the main course.

What I mean by this is that you should use them sparingly.

If every other text message you send him is a sexy text, it’s quickly going to get boring, and they will lose their intended effect.

The next thing that you must understand is that “flirty” doesn’t necessarily mean “filthy”.

Sure, some flirty text messages you can send will sound a little risqué, but they don’t have to.

In fact, you are going to quickly discover that the more subtle your messages are and the more that they’re filled with innuendo, the more powerful their effects will be on your man.

Lastly, you will find that sending your man a flirty text message can be the perfect way to build anticipation.

Doing this will keep him thinking about you for a long, long time even if it will be awhile until you’re able to hang out together.

So now that we’ve covered some of the important things to keep in mind if you want these flirty text messages to be effective, let’s learn exactly what to send.

Here are 16 examples of flirty texts to send him when you when to flirt with a guy over text.

1. Why do I always think of you when I’m trying to concentrate on studying … Grrr, hate you so much right now!

2. What would you do if I told you that I have an identical twin sister?

3. Had trouble sleeping last night, needed you there snuggling me.

5. Should I wear a short skirt tonight or a really short skirt?

6. If you could only do one thing sexually with me for the rest of your life, what would it be?

7. I think I just saw you or someone that looked just like you, are you wearing a green turtleneck today?

8. I’m thinking about becoming celibate for the rest of my life, what do you think?

9. What would you like me to wear tonight?

10. I had a dream about you last night, it was hot!

11. Do you think you could beat me in an arm wrestle?

12. I’ve got a surprise for you later, I think you’re going to really like it 😉

13. I was thinking of dressing up in something hot tonight, what would you prefer, maid or nurse?

14. I’m wearing a colored bra today, guess which color …

15. Explain something to me — what’s the big deal with threesomes?

16. Stop thinking about me! (I know. It’s hard, isn’t it …)

Please don’t think you have to use every single one of these flirty messages on your man.

Just pick and choose the ones that you like and use them.

If you are just starting a relationship with your man, then you probably don’t want to use any of the more risqué or sexual text messages at first.

Lastly don’t be afraid to change, adapt and modify these messages slightly to fit your life and your man. For example, you could change ‘studying’ to ‘working,’ etc.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

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How to Flirt by Touch Without Making It Obvious at All

A flirting touch is exciting and intimate, and yet, it’s harmless and casual. Find out how to flirt by touching and understand the world of body language flirting right here.

It’s not easy to flirt, especially when you can’t get to spend some time alone with the special someone.

But you can still get your message across with a flirting touch, and without overdoing it.

Learn the secrets behind how to flirt by touching without saying a word.

The secret of a flirting touch

Ever felt a tingle of excitement rush up your spine when a good looking person of the opposite sex brushes your arm for no apparent reason?

Well, you’re not alone. An unexpected touch can be warm and fuzzy to just about anyone, and it’s always a great way to show that you have something more than ‘just friends’ in mind.

Another person’s touch (we’re talking about the opposite sex here!) is always soothing, and yet, at the same time, leaves us feeling flushed and slightly uncomfortable. But, one can’t help but want more.

How to flirt by touching

A guy who gets touched by a girl in the middle of a conversation can’t help but connect to her sexually, and a girl who feels the palm of a guy guide her lower back unexpectedly can’t help feeling the tingle rush down her spine.

It happens naturally, doesn’t it?

There may have been times when you are in the middle of a sleepy conversation while this friend just drones on and on about the problems they’re having with their third aunt’s great grandmother. But then, when this friend grasps your palm gently and asks you for an opinion, you can’t help but slip up a bit, and pull yourself together.

It’s not because you were touched by the boring story, but because you suddenly warmed up to this friend, and just for that instant, you actually realized that your chat-mate is a member of the opposite sex.

And just for that one moment, thoughts of more than just holding hands flash across your mind. Yeah, yeah… I know you’ve felt that. You don’t need to squirm and protest. And the surprising fact about it is that, it happens to everybody! Irrespective of how good looking or charming either of you are. But yeah, it can get creepy if the touch lingers too long!

Why do we get excited by a flirting touch?

So why does this happen? Why do we (even if it is for just an instant) get attracted sexually to this friend all of a sudden, just because of a simple unexpected touch? Well, you see, it’s all in our head. Our minds are programmed in such a way that a human touch triggers a positive feeling within us.

Real life flirting touches and emotional connections

And this makes a huge impact on who we get attracted to. The impact of touch is a lot stronger than our senses of sight, smell, or sound. Let’s just contemplate over this thought.

Now why do you think people find it a lot easier to open up while partying? And why is it that it’s so easy to kiss someone on the dance floor, even if it’s just friends? No, it’s not the booze and the music (though they do play a small part). It’s actually all in the power of playful touching. Our sense of touch is so strong when it comes to attraction of the sexes that it overpowers all other senses put together, albeit momentarily, or until one of you get back to your senses.

That means you can simply touch a member of the opposite sex the right way and attract them, better than you would have been able to do in any other way.

The sense of touch in humans is so sensitive because of today’s society. When someone whom you know as “just a friend” holds your hand accidentally, it comes as a surprise. Can you remember the last time you were in a situation where another person of the opposite sex touched you flirtatiously? You sure can’t forget that person, can you? The fact that you can remember that flirty person so easily just demonstrates the power of flirting touching.

The real art of flirting by touching

Flirting by accidental touch doesn’t mean manhandling and pawing at the other person. It’s the subtle art of drawing a person closer to you with your lingering touch. But this form of flirting is never easy, and there’s a lot more chance of you being labeled slutty or horny rather than a cool cat.

Some people touch all the time, which makes decoding these signs all the more harder. But if you know how to go about it the right way, and compliment your accidental touches with your tone and body language, you won’t just get the message across, you’ll have your date all over you!

Learn the art of flirting by touch and learn to flirt and seduce someone into liking you in no time.

 

Thank you for reading my blog. Please read, like, comment, and most of all follow Phicklephilly. I publish every day.

Buy Phicklephilly THE BOOK now available on Amazon!

Listen to the Phicklephilly podcast LIVE on Spotify!

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Sun Stories: Olivia – Flirt – Part II

Another tale of one man’s journey navigating his way through the dating scene in Philadelphia.

From time to time over the summer, Olivia would come in and chat a little bit before her sessions and it was a small slice of paradise for me. Don’t get me wrong, there are dozens of women that come in the spa every day that are really good talent. But there is just something about a small percentage of them that just light me up. I think what it comes down to is, they are obviously attractive but there is something else. They have to be a little engaging. We have hundreds of active clients right now, and I would say under 20 really do it for us. Olivia would talk about her life a little and how she is dating some guy but it’s not working out. (Me, so happy when I hear that!)

One day a former colleague of mine was in town to meet me for lunch. After lunch he wanted to go to the spa. Yes, the same one where I work part-time. We get there and the waiting room is packed. The Temple girls are all going back to school, so they are all back for their treatments. He grabs the last seat and I’m just standing there surrounded by all of these women sitting around waiting. Who walks in but Olivia. She walks right up to me and hugs me. “Where have you been all of my life.” I swear she said that. We’re chatting and to me everyone in the room disappeared. I saw only her. The loveseat opened up when a few of the girls were being waited on, and Achilles from behind the counter says “Will you two sit down!” We laugh and she says “Yes Dad!” And I say, “Dad, you’re embarrassing me!” We takes a seat and she’s telling me about school, and work and stuff, and I’m loving it. This is the high point of the day. She tells me she is working this Friday, and says I should come up and visit her. She says she’s hostessing so she’ll be able to chat all night. I tell her I’ll see. She goes tanning, then off to work.

Of course I don’t go. After working at the spa until 8pm and then cleaning up, I’m ready to just go home and have a drink, and watch Netflix. I’m not getting on the train and going all the way up to Fishtown at 9pm. Not happening.

A week passes and it’s the next Friday, and who comes strolling in at 7:30. Olivia. She looks amazing as always. The great thing is, it’s dead on Friday nights and we can chat. The first thing she says is, “Somebody was supposed to come visit me last week and never did.” I apologized and explained why and she was fine with it. Her phone died and I told her I had a charger. She comes around the counter to plug-in and starts showing me all of these pictures of her family. Of course they are all Aryan greatness, and she tells me everyone has blue eyes. It’s a big family. I think like 5 kids! All good-looking. I’m looking at her beautiful face right next to me and her lashes are so long, and I simply adore her. I’m mesmerized by her beauty.

She glances past me at the other computer and asks what that is on the screen. I was working on phicklephilly on the other unit. I admit that I write this blog about people I meet in Philadelphia. She inquires deeper, and I admit that it’s about all of the women I have met in the last 10 years. She says she wants to read it and I should send her the link. I’m completely under her power at this point, but see a wonderful opportunity. I tell her I can’t do that because I don’t have any of her contact info. I give her my phone and she writes her name with some emojis next to it. A smiling sun, cherries, and a bomb. I don’t know what any of this means, but I don’t care because I am so happy. I now have her contact info. I tell her that if we meet up outside of here, I will have to write about it. I think she likes the idea of the attention. I tell her I change all of the names and use stock photos for the pics on each post. She says I should use her real picture, and I tell her I’ll think about it. She actually uses the words “Text me and we’ll go out on a date.” At that moment I was so excited, I wish I could have tied my belt around my head so that it didn’t explode like that dude in the movie, Scanners.

Ha ha ha! Yeah!!!!

Of course I say: “Are you sure? Like brunch or meet for a drink?” She says, yes. This is all very surreal, but I am overcome with euphoria. I tell her I’ll keep and eye on her phone and she goes back for her session. When she comes out she hugs me and says to reach out to her. I give her the phone, which she nearly forgot. Then off she goes into the night.

I’m super happy at this point. So as I’m closing up and settling the register, I put on some triumphant music.

The next night around 1:30am, my phone rings and it’s her. But I’m asleep! The next morning I see that she called, and there is a voicemail! I can’t imagine my luck. I wonder what she will say? I play the message and it is two and a half minutes of muffled static.

Later, I get this text: “OMGOSH I butt dialed you by accident!! I did it to like a bunch of people bc my phone was in my back pocket at work haha oops!”

I waited a few hours (because that’s the cool thing to do so it looks like you have a life)

Then I responded: “Blame your butt all you want. You know you wanted to call me! ha ha”

Crickets.

Sigh…

 

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